The "Baby Store Near Me" Trap: A Father's Reconnaissance Guide
I'm standing under fluorescent lights that could illuminate a surgical theatre, sweating through my jumper while a nineteen-year-old named Brayden earnestly explains the shock absorption capabilities of a Β£1,200 double pram. One of the twins is currently trying to eat...
Decoding the Holiday Dress Code: Surviving Baby's First Christmas
I'm currently staring at a miniature three-piece tweed suit that my mother-in-law mailed us for my 11-month-old daughter's first holiday party. It has an actual pocket square. It has a vest with decorative buttons smaller than a grain of rice....
Why the clothing industry is completely wrong about little boys
There's this incredibly persistent, borderline dangerous myth floating around the local playgroups that dressing male children is somehow the easy way out. The working theory goes that while parents of girls are trapped in a complex matrix of tights that...
Surviving the sticky, panic-inducing reality of baby suncare
It was late May, the temperature had inexplicably hit 22 degrees in London, and I was staring at my twin daughters in their double pram like they were gremlins about to melt in the light. They were barely four months...
Navigating the Chaos of Buying Tiny Outfits for Premature Babies
My mom told me they didn't even make garments that small back in the day and to just wrap her in a receiving blanket until she chunked up. The NICU nurse told me to immediately send my husband out to...
The Great Trouser Battle: A Letter To Myself About Dressing Boys
Dear Jess of six months ago: You're currently sweating entirely through your good linen blouse, pinning a flailing four-year-old to the living room rug while desperately trying to yank a pair of stiff, miniature raw-denim jeans over his incredibly solid...
What Nobody Tells You About Buying Clothes for Your Newborn
I was exactly thirty-eight weeks pregnant with my first kid, sitting on the floor of his perfectly painted sage green nursery, just absolutely sobbing over a tiny tweed vest. I had spent the last six months accumulating what can only...
The Great Baby Markt Meltdown (And What You Actually Need)
I was exactly thirty-four weeks pregnant with my oldest son, sitting on the cold bathroom tile at two in the morning, openly weeping over a seventy-dollar wipe warmer. My phone was glowing in the dark with fourteen different tabs open,...
The Huge Car Seat Lie That Cost Me Weeks of Sleep (And Money)
I was standing in the middle of a big box baby storeβseven months pregnant with Leo, wearing maternity leggings that definitely had a crusty yogurt stain on the knee from God knows whereβjust absolutely sobbing. My husband Dave was holding...