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The 3 AM Blowout That Made Me Respect the Newborn White Onesie
It was 3:14 AM. November. I know this because my phone flashlight was blinding me and the digital clock on the microwave was blinking in the background while I stood in the kitchen wearing a fleece Target robe from like,...
The Brutal, Messy Truth About Surviving Baby Onesies
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, roughly six weeks into the twin experiment, and I was holding a small, violently crying creature at arm's length. The issue wasn't the crying (I'd grown accustomed to the acoustic assault), but rather...
Why My Toxic Relationship With Funny Baby Onesies Finally Ended
Kamini auntie handed me a gift bag that smelled vaguely of mothballs and aggressively cheap vinyl. We were at my baby shower, sitting in a circle of fifty women drinking chai, and I was performing the delicate art of opening...