Magazine

Toddler boy playing with green rubber blocks on a messy living room rug

Why a Baby Alligator is My Toddler's Weirdest Obsession

It's Tuesday at 2 PM, and I'm standing in this aggressively air-conditioned reptile sanctuary off the highway in Florida, sweating through a vintage band tee that used to be my favorite before it got permanently stained with oat milk. I'm...

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The truth about surviving the baby groot merchandise invasion

I was elbow-deep under the sofa cushions on a Tuesday morning, executing a routine sweep for rogue Cheerios and whatever sticky substance had claimed the TV remote, when my fingers brushed against something hard, plastic, and distinctly anatomical. I pulled...

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A heavily chewed cardboard book sitting next to a half-empty cup of cold coffee

The Great Baby Book Delusion: Expectations vs Actual Reality

I'm currently looking at a copy of The Very Hungry Caterpillar that has been so thoroughly chewed, sucked, and dismantled by my twin two-year-old daughters that it looks less like a beloved piece of children's literature and more like something...

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A skeptical pediatric nurse looking at her phone showing a viral wildlife video.

Why That Viral Bush Baby TikTok Is A Terrible Idea For Your Toddler

My cousin in Miami texted me a video of a tiny primate eating a grape on Tuesday and told me I should get one for Maya's second birthday. Three hours later, a girl in my local mom group forwarded the...

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Mother holding a wooden toy looking thoughtfully at a smartphone screen.

What The Bhad Bhabie Cautionary Tale Teaches Modern Parents

Listen. Last week, my mother-in-law told me I should delete every single photo of my toddler from the internet because the world is entirely composed of predators. The next morning, a fellow nurse at the clinic insisted I need to...

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Toddler playing with soft building blocks on the floor

A letter to myself before I pressed play on that movie

Dear Priya from six months ago. Listen. Put down the television remote and step away from the streaming menu. I know it's eight in the evening, your toddler has been screaming about steering wheels since naptime, and you're operating on...

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Toddler chewing on a modern silicone teether toy instead of vintage plush

The day my mother's vintage toy hoard almost ruined our lives

I was elbow-deep in a bowl of lukewarm oatmeal on a miserable, sleeting Chicago afternoon when my mother dragged a black Hefty garbage bag into my apartment. She had the frantic, secretive energy of someone smuggling contraband across a border....

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A glowing baby einstein sea dreams soother attached to a wooden crib

My toxic relationship with that glowing Baby Einstein aquarium

It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in November. I'm standing barefoot in the hallway, wearing a stained nursing tank that I still haven't washed even though my son Leo is three and Maya is eight months old, and I'm practically...

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Toddler twin girls in London flat playing with soft baby dolls on the floor

Why baby dolls took over my flat (and what the science says)

I'm currently staring at a small, disembodied plastic leg poking out from beneath our sofa. It belongs to ‘Baby Susan’, a doll who has suffered more blunt force trauma in the past three weeks than an amateur rugby player. If...

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