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The Real Lesson Behind the Bhad Bhabie Baby Daddy Drama
When I was pregnant with my oldest, Maya, my grandmother sat me down at her kitchen table, pushed a cup of extremely weak Lipton tea toward me, and told me that a mother's only real job is to keep her...
What The Gypsy Rose Baby Taught Me About Generational Trauma
It’s 3:14 AM. I’m sitting on the cold tile of my bathroom floor wearing Dave’s gross college sweatpants with the mysterious bleach stain on the left knee, holding a sleeping Leo who currently feels like a thirty-pound sack of wet...
Miss Nikki Baby, Rainbow Babies, and Tuning Out the Internet Noise
I spent the entirety of my second pregnancy locked in the downstairs half-bath, doom-scrolling baby forums until my legs fell asleep and my phone battery hit two percent. I was convinced every tiny twinge was a catastrophe, and I was...
The pretty baby brooke shields documentary totally broke my brain
It was 11:43 PM on a random Tuesday, and I was sitting on the couch in my husband Mike's college sweatpants—the ones with the highly questionable bleach stain on the knee—eating slightly stale goldfish crackers directly off Maya's Elsa plate....
Letter to Past Me: That Sorry Baby Movie Is Definitely Not A Comedy
Dear Jess from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the faded living room rug in your yoga pants, elbow-deep in a mountain of mismatched toddler socks, staring blindly at the streaming menu. Your oldest is trying to feed his...
What Nobody Tells You About Having a Pitbull and a New Baby
I was sitting on the sticky laminate floor of our kitchen at 2:14 AM, wearing maternity leggings with a suspicious yogurt stain on the left knee, absolutely sobbing into a mug of decaf instant coffee. I was seven months pregnant...
The Truth About the Baby Boomers Years and Grandparenting
I was standing over the kitchen sink, scraping congealed mac and cheese off a plastic plate with my fingernail, when I heard my mom tell my oldest, "Here you go, baby boo, let's just put a little extra blanket in...
When The Grandparents Bring Over Their 1980s Death Trap Baby Gear
I was wearing my husband’s stained grey sweatpants, the ones with the mysterious hole near the left knee, standing in my driveway at 10 AM on a Tuesday while clutching a mug of coffee I had already microwaved three times....
Why "hit me baby one more time" is my parenting reality
Last Tuesday at our local library's rhythm and rhyme session, Florence landed a shockingly accurate left hook directly onto my nose just as we were gearing up for the second verse of The Wheels on the Bus. The elderly librarian...