Starring in the Real Baby Daddy Show (Minus the Laugh Track)
Dear Tom, You're currently sitting on the edge of the bathtub, wearing a fleece dressing gown that smells faintly of Sudocrem and despair, staring at a phone screen playing an old episode of that American sitcom. You know the one....
Proud Curvy Girl Seeks Lost Baby Daddy: 3 AM Doomscroll Notes
Dear Priya from last November. You're currently sitting on the closed lid of the downstairs toilet. The bathmat is damp under your bare feet because your husband took a shower three hours ago and didn't turn on the exhaust fan....
My Gangster Baby Daddy Pampers Me To Paradise: Real Dad Take
"Just let her sleep when the baby sleeps," my mom told me over FaceTime, which is mathematically impossible unless I also figure out how to sleep when the baby sleeps, and then who exactly is watching the dog or paying...
My Baby Daddy Is A Bed Bug: A Custody Exchange Survival Guide
Dear Priya from last October. You're currently staring at a navy blue canvas duffel bag in the entryway of your Chicago apartment, wondering if you can legally set it on fire. Your baby daddy just pulled away in his Honda....
What The Lana Rhoades Baby Drama Taught Me About Online Privacy
I was sitting on the cold hexagon tiles of my downstairs bathroom at 2:14 AM, the blue light of my phone illuminating a weird stain on my sweatpants that I was aggressively pretending was just yogurt. Leo was four months...
What the Wendy Ortiz baby daddy drama gets right about parenting
The screen brightness on my phone is turned all the way down to a dull gray. Outside, the Chicago winter wind is doing that thing where it sounds like a dying animal against the windowpanes. It's two in the morning....
Why We Are Obsessed With The Homeless Billionaire Baby Daddy
My mother-in-law told me I just needed to pray harder to find my village. The lactation consultant at the hospital said I needed to schedule self-care in fifteen-minute increments. My best friend, three margaritas deep, told me to just download...
The Amber Heard Baby Daddy Mystery & My 3AM Google Rabbit Hole
It's exactly 3:14 AM. My 11-month-old son, who we'll refer to as Baby D to protect his future digital footprint, has decided that sleeping through the night is a legacy feature he no longer supports. I'm pacing the hardwood floor...
Spoiled By My Billionaire Baby Daddy: The Real Truth About Luxury
I was standing at the kitchen island at eleven o'clock last night, aggressively scrubbing dried sweet potato off a highchair tray with a sponge that had definitely seen better days, when my phone auto-played a clip from that ridiculous viral...