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When the Internet Decides Your Toddler Needs Street Cred
I was wiping smeared avocado off my toddler's chin at the local park when a pack of ten-year-olds sat on the bench next to us. One of them had a phone propped up, blasting gang baby lyrics into the humid...
Palace Confirms Baby Number 4 Rumors: The Reality of Four Kids
It was three in the morning, Chicago was freezing, and I was pinned under the dead weight of my toddler while doomscrolling TikTok. The blue light was burning my retinas when a robotic AI voice read a headline over a...
What Being a Baby Mama Actually Means Off the Internet
I was sitting on the floor of my guest bedroomβwhich I generously call my "Etsy shipping headquarters"βwith packing tape stuck to my thigh, listening to a 90s hip-hop playlist, when a song came on loudly dropping the phrase "baby mama."...
The Truth About Baby Fat and Why My Doctor Said Stop Stressing
I was sitting on the crinkly paper of the exam table at our pediatricianβs office, practically sweating through my shirt, while my middle child Wyatt sat there looking like a dinner roll that had just exploded out of its tin....
The Reality of Sparkle Megan's Baby Reveal (From a Tired Dad)
Dear Marcus of six months ago. It's currently 3:14 AM, the rain is aggressively battering the Portland windows, and you're sitting in the glider chair trying to figure out if breathing too loudly will wake up the tiny human currently...
Otaku Parenting and the Messy Reality of Cute Anime Baby Trends
My sister-in-law cornered me at a family barbecue, holding a dripping hot dog that was dangerously close to my sweater, to insist that if I didn't dress four-month-old Leo in a full Naruto outfit for his first official photos, I...