The Real Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper Meaning (And Why We Care)
When Leo was about two and a half, his vocabulary basically consisted of "no," "dog," and this aggressive grunting noise that meant he wanted more goldfish crackers. I was obviously losing my mind about it. So I'm standing in the...
The Truth About Baby Fat and Why My Doctor Said Stop Stressing
I was sitting on the crinkly paper of the exam table at our pediatricianβs office, practically sweating through my shirt, while my middle child Wyatt sat there looking like a dinner roll that had just exploded out of its tin....
Why Your Infant is Basically a Baby Monkey (And Why That's Okay)
It was 3:14 AM, and I was wearing a gray Target nursing tank that smelled strongly of sour milk and desperation. My husband Dave was snoringβnot like a cute, rhythmic rumble, but this full-blown, windows-rattling snore that made me want...
What That Weird Jelly Slime and Mucus in Baby Poop Really Means
I was standing in the family restroom at Target, balancing a lukewarm iced coffee on the edge of the changing table, staring down at a diaper that looked, for lack of a better description, like a ghost had sneezed in...
Troubleshooting Green Baby Poop When You're Running on Empty
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday when my iPhone flashlight illuminated a diaper that looked like it had been sponsored by a 1990s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles action figure factory. Neon, radioactive, undeniably green. I froze with a baby...
The 2 AM Google Spiral About Baby Milestones
It was 2:14 in the morning on a Tuesday. Or maybe Wednesday? Time doesn't actually exist when you've an eleven-month-old who treats sleep like a hostile negotiation. I was sitting on the floor of Maya's nursery, wearing Dave's grey zip-up...
I asked a doctor what do babies dream about and the truth hurts
It was three in the morning in our drafty Chicago apartment when my son let out a sound that was half-giggle, half-choke. I stood over his bassinet, gripping the edge like I was bracing for an earthquake. His eyes were...
Why those stiff miniature adult sneakers are ruining baby feet
We were at Maggie Daley Park, right in the middle of a brutal Chicago November, and my son was bleeding from his mouth. I'd dressed him in these incredibly expensive, highly structured miniature basketball shoes. They looked exactly like my...
My Messy Guide to Surviving All Three Kinds of Baby Sharks
I'm standing in the downstairs bathroom at six in the morning, holding a plastic light-up dinosaur flashlight between my teeth, trying to pry my five-year-old's jaw open while he thrashes around like a feral raccoon trapped in a feed bin....