Why A Taylor Big Baby Fits My Nursery & My Ten-Pound Infant

Don't let your overly enthusiastic mother-in-law convince you to buy forty boxes of Size N diapers when your doctor says you're measuring three weeks ahead, y'all. I'm just gonna be real with you, that massive tower of pristine white Huggies sat in the corner of my living room completely mocking me the day I brought my oldest home from the hospital. He was ten pounds and two ounces of solid Texas brisket, bless his heart, and he couldn't even squeeze his chunky little thighs into a newborn onesie if I buttered him up first. My grandma told me to just buy the cheap stretchy nightgowns and wait to see what came out, but did I listen? Nope, I bought all those stiff little denim newborn overalls that he wore exactly zero times.

My oldest is my living cautionary tale for basically everything in motherhood, but especially for buying gear based on how cute it looks instead of how functional it actually is.

Why my husband insisted on a nursery guitar

If you fell down a weird internet rabbit hole and landed here looking for the Taylor Big Baby acoustic guitar to play lullabies, you're actually in the right place. My husband bought a Taylor Big Baby right before our second child arrived because he wanted an acoustic nursery guitar that didn't feel like a cheap plastic toy from a big box store. It's supposedly a 15/16th scale model, which is just guitar-nerd speak for saying it fits perfectly in a cramped rocking chair without you constantly knocking over the bedside lamp.

It's honestly great because the neck bolts on, it's decently priced for our budget, and it doesn't cramp up his fingers like some of those tiny travel guitars do. Having him sit in the corner and quietly strum actual music puts my kids to sleep way faster than those creepy, out-of-tune mechanical mobiles ever did. But since Kianao makes sustainable baby gear and not musical instruments, let's pivot and talk about the literal, flesh-and-blood big baby, because raising a giant infant is an extreme sport that nobody warned me about.

My doctor and the giant baby diagnosis

When I was pregnant, my doctor casually mentioned that anything over 8 pounds 13 ounces is technically called fetal macrosomia, which sounds like a terrifying sci-fi movie alien but basically just means you grew a giant human. I vaguely remember her saying it happens in about nine percent of pregnancies, usually if you've gestational diabetes or if you just have tall genetics in your family. My husband is six-foot-four and eats like a horse, so I really should have seen it coming, though the medical talk about shoulder dystocia and C-section risks went completely over my head while I was busy worrying about what color to paint the nursery walls.

They wrap all this medical science in so many disclaimers that you never really know if your ultrasound is accurate or if the machine is just measuring a weird shadow. But when they pulled my son out of the sunroof, the entire operating room literally gasped, which is never a sound you want to hear from people holding surgical instruments.

Heavy infants will absolutely destroy your lower back

Let me talk about baby carriers for a second because this specific topic makes me crazy. I run a small Etsy shop out of my spare bedroom here in rural Texas, making custom wooden signs and packing boxes while trying to keep three kids under five alive. When my ten-pounder was an infant, I thought I could just strap him to my chest in one of those buttery soft, aesthetically pleasing wrap carriers you see all over the internet and pack my Etsy orders all day.

Those stretchy fabric wraps are a complete joke if your baby is heavy. I'd tie him up tight, and within twenty minutes of standing in my kitchen, he would slowly sink down my chest until his forehead was basically bouncing off my kneecaps. They stretch out, they sag under the weight, and they'll absolutely wreck your spine if your kid is gaining a pound a week.

My mom always said that back in her day, they just carried babies on their hips and dealt with the inevitable backache, which is totally wild to me because why on earth would you suffer if you don't have to? Upgrading to an ugly, rigid, hiking-style carrier with an obnoxious amount of thick lumbar support is the only way to survive carrying a massive infant without eating ibuprofen like candy by four in the afternoon.

I'll save you some time right now on the rest of the registry hype: wipe warmers are a complete scam that just breed bacteria and dry out your expensive wipes, so toss that right off your list.

They outgrow the expensive bassinet in five seconds

With my oldest, we bought this beautiful, expensive bedside bassinet that looked like it belonged in a fancy magazine. He looked like a giant stuffed into a shoebox by week three. I remember waking up in a panic at two in the morning because his little feet were literally pressed flat against the mesh side, and he was completely stuck.

We had to move the full-sized crib into our bedroom immediately, which meant my husband had to completely disassemble the heavy wooden frame, carry it down the narrow hallway in the dark, and squeeze it past my rocking chair while cursing under his breath. So if your doctor is telling you to expect a big kid, saving your money and skipping the tiny aesthetic bassinet entirely in favor of a mini-crib is a solid financial move.

By the way, if you're looking for clothes that won't cut off your chunky infant's circulation, you can check out our stretchy Kianao baby clothing because natural fibers actually forgive a rapid growth spurt way better than cheap polyester.

Feeding a literal linebacker child

My middle child was another giant, and the sheer volume of food he could throw on the floor during a single meal was staggering. Big babies eat constantly, and they get incredibly strong very fast, which makes introducing solid foods an absolute battlefield.

I'm obsessed with the Baby Silicone Plate we carry at Kianao. One night I lovingly made this elaborate sweet potato mash, and my son just casually backhanded the entire plastic bowl off his highchair tray. It hit the floor sounding like a wet explosion, and the dog wouldn't even eat it. I immediately tossed all our flimsy plastic bowls and grabbed this bear plate because the suction base seriously glues itself to the table. Pressing it down firmly creates this intense vacuum seal that's honestly hilarious to watch a strong toddler try to rip off. Plus it's food-grade silicone, so tossing it in the top rack of the dishwasher when he finally goes to sleep is incredibly easy.

Stuff you really need for a giant infant

When those big babies start getting their teeth, it's brutal. Because they're physically larger, their bites seem ten times stronger, and when my oldest got his first teeth at four months, his swollen gums turned him into an angry, drooly mess. Giving him the Panda Teether was a lifesaver because it has a flat, easy-to-grasp shape that his chunky little hands could seriously hold without dropping it every two seconds. If you just toss the silicone panda in the fridge for ten minutes before handing it over, you might honestly get to enjoy a few minutes of momentary silence while they gnaw on the textured bamboo details.

Now, I'll be totally honest with you about the Gentle Baby Building Block Set we sell. They're just okay. They're made of soft rubber, and supposedly you can use them in the bathtub because they float, but my kids mostly just chew on them for five minutes and then kick them under the sofa where they collect dust. They cost around twenty bucks, which isn't awful for a safe toy, but expecting them to hold a toddler's attention for more than the time it takes you to drink a lukewarm cup of coffee is setting yourself up for disappointment.

My mom bought us the Wooden Baby Gym because he was her first g baby and she desperately wanted my chaotic house to look put-together, bless her heart. It does look gorgeous in the corner of the living room with its warm-toned crochet cactus and little lama hanging from the sustainable wood frame. But I'm just gonna be real with you, your big baby is just going to lay there on the floor and stare at it while drooling for maybe ten minutes before they realize they can't roll over and start screaming to be picked up again. It's a beautiful heirloom piece, but no wooden play gym is going to magically babysit a heavy, fussy infant while you try to switch the laundry.

Before you completely panic about giving birth to a literal toddler, taking a few minutes to delete all the stiff newborn outfits from your registry and clicking over to our main Kianao shop for some stretchy, high-quality pieces will save you so many tears later.

Frequently asked questions about giant babies

Will my big baby roll over or walk later than average?

I was so incredibly paranoid about this because my oldest just lay on his back like a baked potato for months while my friends' babies were crawling. My doctor casually mentioned that larger babies sometimes take a little longer to fight gravity, which makes total sense when you think about how much extra weight they've to physically lift. Trying not to stress if your chunky kid isn't doing gymnastics at four months is hard, but they usually catch up just fine once their muscles get stronger.

Do I really need to skip size newborn diapers completely?

Keeping one small, cheap pack of size newborn diapers around isn't a terrible idea just in case the ultrasound was wildly wrong and you honestly deliver a tiny peanut. But buying them in bulk at a warehouse club is a guaranteed way to throw your hard-earned money in the trash, so you're much better off stocking up on size one and even size two, because trying to return open boxes of diapers when you're running on three hours of sleep is pure misery.

Can I still use a stretchy wrap carrier for a heavy newborn?

You can certainly try it out, but your lower back will probably start screaming at you within twenty minutes of walking around your kitchen. Stretchy jersey fabrics just can't defy the laws of physics when you strap fifteen pounds of squirming baby to your chest, which is exactly why upgrading to a structured carrier with an obnoxious amount of thick lumbar support is the absolute smartest thing you can do for your postpartum spine.

Is the Taylor Big Baby guitar too loud for a small nursery?

It seriously has a surprisingly mellow, sweet tone compared to a massive full-sized dreadnought guitar, which makes it absolutely perfect for playing in a small carpeted bedroom without waking up the entire house. My husband just uses a lighter guitar pick and strums softly in the rocking chair, and listening to that acoustic sound puts our kids to sleep way faster than any of those electronic white noise machines we wasted money on.