When Do Puppies Lose Their Baby Teeth?

Yesterday at the feed store, old man Miller told me to just give our new mutt pup an old leather work boot to chew on and call it a day. Then I check my phone and my sister texts me a five-page article about how I need to be massaging the dog's gums with organic cold-pressed coconut oil twice a day to prevent trauma. And to top it all off, my grandma called to say I shouldn't even be worrying about the timeline for puppy teething because dogs just swallow their teeth anyway, which is frankly horrifying but she said it so casually while talking about her tomato plants that I didn't want to argue.

I'm just gonna be real with you all. I'm currently staring at my four-month-old rescue lab-mix who's actively trying to digest my youngest daughter's favorite vintage-wash baby tee. I snatched the damp, ruined fabric out of his mouth, gave him a piece of a frozen carrot instead, and found a tiny, bloody tooth stuck right in the collar of the shirt.

Having a baby is hard, but having a new puppy at the exact same time is a completely different circus. If you're frantically googling in the middle of the night trying to figure out when these little land-sharks finally drop those needle-sharp milk fangs and start acting like normal animals, welcome to the club.

What our vet actually said about the timeline

According to our country vet—who I basically have on speed dial because having three kids under five and a new dog on two acres means someone is always bleeding or swallowing something weird—the timeline for when they drop their baby teeth is pretty fast, though my sleep-deprived brain probably got some of the exact weeks slightly wrong.

Basically, she told me they're born with empty little gummy mouths, and then somewhere between three and eight weeks old, all these razor-sharp little teeth pop up out of nowhere. Then, right around three or four months old, the tiny front ones start falling out. You probably won't even notice this happening unless you're stepping on them in the living room rug.

The absolute worst phase hits around four to six months when they lose the fangs and the big back teeth, which is exactly where we're right now, hence the destroyed laundry. The vet said by six or seven months, they should have all 42 of their adult permanent teeth, which is honestly a ridiculous amount of teeth for one animal to have in its head.

The double teething nightmare in my house

It's absolute chaos in my living room right now because my six-month-old human daughter is teething at the exact same time as the dog. It's just a chorus of whining, drooling, and everyone trying to put inappropriate things in their mouths.

With my oldest kid, bless his heart, I bought every expensive piece of plastic teething gear the big box stores sold. I spent a fortune, and he still just wanted to chew on the TV remote and the dog's tail. I didn't want to repeat that expensive mistake this time around. I'm a lot more budget-conscious now that I'm paying for preschool times two, plus dog food.

So for the baby, I bought the Panda Teether Silicone Baby Bamboo Chew Toy from Kianao, and honestly, it's the only thing keeping my sanity intact right now. At around fifteen bucks, the price didn't make me want to cry. It's made of food-grade silicone, and I just throw the whole thing in the top rack of the dishwasher when it gets covered in dog hair. The baby sits in her bouncer happily chomping on the textured panda ears, and the dog sits next to her aggressively gnawing on a wet frozen washcloth. The dog actually tried to steal the panda toy once because the silicone is so thick and chewy, but I snatched it back. If you want something that actually holds your kid's attention so you can drink your coffee before it gets cold, just get the panda.

If you've got a little one going through the chew-everything phase at the exact same time as your pet, you might want to browse through Kianao's teething collection before your kid starts gnawing on the furniture right alongside the dog.

The great dog toothpaste delusion

I need to talk about the absolute scam that's puppy dental care expectations on the internet right now. If you look online, people will tell you that the second your puppy's adult teeth come in, you need to be brushing them every single night. I bought a tube of enzymatic poultry-flavored dog toothpaste because the internet made me feel like a negligent mother if I didn't.

Let me paint a picture for you. I spend all day wrestling three toddlers into their clothes, breaking up fights over who gets the blue plastic cup, and scraping dried oatmeal off the kitchen floor. By 8 PM, I'm a hollow shell of a human being. The idea that I'm going to hold down a squirming, forty-pound ball of muscle and energy to rub meat-paste onto his gums with a tiny plastic brush is laughable.

I tried it exactly once. The dog thought it was a game, bit down on the toothbrush, snapped the plastic handle in half, and then licked the chicken-flavored paste off the floor. The whole experience just made his breath smell like a hot rotisserie chicken that had been left in the sun. I threw the rest of the tube in the garbage.

If your puppy still has double fangs by the time you take them in to get spayed or neutered, the vet just yanks the baby ones out while they're asleep anyway, so I wouldn't lose a single minute of sleep worrying about retained teeth.

Things that honestly work (and things that don't)

Since we're constantly outside trying to tire the dog out so he doesn't eat the baseboards, we bring a lot of baby gear out into the dirt. I grabbed the Baby Pacifier Holder Portable Silicone Case a while back. I'm just gonna be real with you—it's just okay. It does exactly what it's supposed to do, which is keep the dirt and dog hair off the pacifier, and it clips nicely to my diaper bag. But honestly? Half the time I'm too tired to seriously squeeze the case open and put the paci back inside properly, so I just shove the sticky pacifier into my back jeans pocket instead. If you're one of those organized moms who color-coordinates your diaper bag, you'll probably love it. I'm just a survival-mode mom doing my best.

You know what else doesn't work? Leaving a clean laundry basket on the floor. My middle kid left another cute baby tee sitting on the edge of the basket yesterday, and the dog immediately claimed it as a chew toy. I've learned to just stop buying nice things right now.

Instead of blowing fifty bucks on premium elk antlers from the boutique pet store—which my vet said can really crack their fragile new teeth anyway—just soak an old rag in beef broth, twist it into a knot, and freeze it. The dog will chew on it for an hour, the cold numbs their sore gums, and it costs you basically zero dollars.

For the human baby, I highly think the Handmade Wood & Silicone Teether Ring. Our doctor said untreated beechwood is great because it has natural antibacterial properties, so I don't have to boil it every five minutes. The silicone beads give the baby good sensory feedback, and it's pretty enough that I don't mind when it ends up in all our family photos. Plus, it's tough enough that when my toddler inevitably steals it to use as a steering wheel for his toy trucks, it doesn't break.

Honestly, you just have to lower your expectations during this phase. There will be tooth marks on your wooden chair legs. You will probably step on a tiny, sharp puppy tooth in your bare feet. Your kid will definitely outgrow that tiny ribbed baby tee before the dog has a chance to fully destroy it anyway. We're all just doing the best we can to survive until they all grow up a little bit.

If you're barely surviving the teething trenches right now and need something safe for your human babies to chew on, go grab some sanity-saving gear from the Kianao shop, lock the dog in his crate with a frozen Kong, and go put your feet up.

Questions I totally Googled at 2 AM

Do dogs really just swallow their teeth?

Yeah, and it still grosses me out every time I think about it. My vet acted like this was completely normal and said they just swallow them while they're eating their kibble or chewing on toys. They pass right through their system harmlessly. So if you never find a single tooth on your floor, consider yourself lucky.

How do I get the puppy to stop biting my kids' hands?

If you figure out a perfect system, please come to my house in Texas and teach me. What kinda works for us is keeping a toy in my back pocket at all times. The second the dog opens his mouth to bite my toddler's hand, I literally just shove a rubber toy in his mouth instead. You just have to redirect them a thousand times a day until you feel like you're losing your mind.

Are ice cubes safe for teething puppies?

My grandma used to just toss ice cubes on the linoleum floor for her dogs, and I do the same thing. The vet said crushed ice or regular cubes are generally fine and help numb their sore gums, but you shouldn't let them chew on huge, rock-hard blocks of ice that could crack a tooth. Plus, it gives me five minutes of peace to fold the laundry while he chases an ice cube around the kitchen.

Should I try to pull a loose puppy tooth myself?

Absolutely not. I know it's super tempting when you see it just dangling there by a thread while they pant, but don't pull it. You can accidentally break the root off under the gumline and cause a massive infection. Just let them chew on something tough and it'll fall out on its own. Trust me, you don't want to be paying an emergency vet bill because you tried to play dog-dentist in your living room.