Magazine

A stressed British dad holding twin toddler girls while looking confused at a phone

The Truth About Baby Kia: A Letter To My Past Parenting Self

You're sitting in traffic on the M25. The rain is hammering against the windscreen of the Vauxhall Astra, and the heater is blasting a smell that can only be described as warm, wet digestive biscuit. In the passenger seat is...

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Purple 1997 memorial bear sitting in a dusty attic box next to modern wooden baby toys.

Don't Give Your Kid That 1997 Purple Bear

I was standing in my mom's sweltering Texas attic last July, sweating through my t-shirt, while she rummaged through a stack of plastic storage bins. She finally pulled out a Ziploc bag with the reverence of someone handling the Declaration...

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Mother holding her toddler looking at a smartphone screen with vintage audio playing

The Connie Francis Pretty Little Baby Trend Made Me Cry

I'm sitting on the faux-wool rug of my Chicago apartment, staring at my phone through the kind of sleep deprivation that makes your teeth physically ache. Rohan is asleep on my chest, a dead weight of milk-drunk toddler. If I...

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Toddler wearing a green baby g costume sitting next to destroyed holiday wrapping paper

Why the Viral Baby Grinch Trend is Actually Ruining Holidays

My mother-in-law told me I needed to establish firm dominance the second my toddler started acting like a green menace this December. The moms in my neighborhood group suggested the exact opposite, telling me to lean into the chaos and...

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A disassembled plastic doll sitting next to a damp cloth and forceps

The surgical reality of buying a baby alive doll for your kid

It's eleven at night. The lighting in my guest bathroom is deeply unflattering. I'm holding a pair of stainless steel tweezers in my right hand and my phone flashlight in my left. Pinned firmly beneath my elbow is a rigid...

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Frantic dad trying to shop for baby gear online with twins

The Great Megastore Myth and What Babies Actually Need

The most long-standing lie of modern parenting is that you can't safely extract a newborn from the hospital without first making a pilgrimage to a brightly lit, warehouse-sized retail behemoth. I distinctly remember sitting in the dark at 3am, furiously...

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Toddler chewing on a modern silicone teether toy instead of vintage plush

The day my mother's vintage toy hoard almost ruined our lives

I was elbow-deep in a bowl of lukewarm oatmeal on a miserable, sleeting Chicago afternoon when my mother dragged a black Hefty garbage bag into my apartment. She had the frantic, secretive energy of someone smuggling contraband across a border....

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A glowing baby einstein sea dreams soother attached to a wooden crib

My toxic relationship with that glowing Baby Einstein aquarium

It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in November. I'm standing barefoot in the hallway, wearing a stained nursing tank that I still haven't washed even though my son Leo is three and Maya is eight months old, and I'm practically...

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Mom holding a silicone baby teether instead of a dangerous ice cube

When Ice Ice Baby Goes Wrong: Teething, Choking, and Cold Fails

I was standing in my kitchen at two in the morning in a ratty t-shirt, sweat dripping down my back because Texas in July is basically a swamp, watching a piece of ice slide out of my fingers and straight...

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