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Exhausted mom in stained sweatpants holding a sleeping newborn while holding a cold cup of coffee

Why We Blasted Baby Pluto To Survive The Fourth Trimester

It’s 3:17 AM on a Tuesday in November. I’m sitting in the driver’s seat of my husband Dave’s Honda Civic, parked securely in our own driveway with the engine idling. I’m wearing a gray fleece bathrobe that smells aggressively like...

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A messy living room floor with a baby reaching for a soft plush toy next to coffee

My Disastrous Attempt at Raising a PokΓ©mon Fan (And What Worked)

It was a Tuesday in 2019, I was running on maybe three hours of broken sleep, wearing a pair of Target leggings that smelled vaguely of sour milk, and I decided this was the perfect moment to introduce my then-two-year-old...

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A toddler in a black organic cotton bodysuit playing with a wooden bat toy on a dark rug.

Raising A Baby Goth Without Losing Your Mind Or Your Aesthetic

The grand, sweeping myth of alternative parenting is that we're all gliding around dimly lit Victorian manors, raising miniature vampires who only listen to Bauhaus and politely refuse to play with brightly coloured plastic. The depressing reality is that I'm...

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A half-empty bottle of organic baby formula sitting next to a folded crochet baby blanket

Dear Me: What I Wish I Knew About That Happy Baby Organic Formula

You're currently sitting on the edge of the bathtub, the bathroom door locked so your husband doesn't hear you crying, with your phone screen brightness turned down to one percent while you frantically google what the heck you're supposed to...

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Tired mom holding coffee while looking at her phone reading about celebrity privilege

What the Gracie Abrams Nepo Baby Drama Taught Me About Parenting

I was sitting in the driver's seat of my Subaru in the Target parking lot at roughly 4:15 PM on a Tuesday, wearing gray sweatpants that had an unidentifiedβ€”and honestly, highly suspiciousβ€”stain on the left knee. It was like 84...

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A group of millennial women laughing around a coffee table at a modern baby shower.

Ditching the Cringe: Baby Shower Activities People Actually Like

I was standing in my sister-in-law's cramped kitchen, holding a flimsy plastic spoon, trying to scrape melted, lukewarm Snickers out of a newborn diaper while seven women I barely knew stared at me in absolute silence. The chocolate had congealed...

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4-month-oldauditory safetybaby developmentmillennialsparenting humor
Baby playing on a wooden play gym while parents listen to music in the living room

The Day I Realized My Baby's Nursery Was Basically a Loud Nightclub

I was sitting on the itchy wool rug in our old apartment, wearing my husband’s college sweatshirt that had a very distinct, crusted-over spit-up stain right on the collarbone. It was raining outside. I was clutching a mug of French...

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A tired mom holding a crying baby while looking shocked at an iPad screen

The Truth About That Devil May Cry Baby Search You Did Last Night

Dear Jess from six months ago, I see you. You're standing at the kitchen island, up to your elbows in mashed sweet potatoes, trying to finish two custom embroidery orders for the Etsy shop before the post office in town...

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eco-friendlyhistoryinfant healthmillennialsorganic baby clothesparenting humor
A tired father holding a baby while looking at his smartphone

The Late-Night Rabbit Hole That Changed How I View "Toxic" Baby Gear

I was pinned beneath a sleeping 12-kilogram toddler, desperately trying to breathe as shallowly as possible so as not to wake her, when my casual 3am doomscrolling took a violently dark turn. I had been trying to search for some...

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