Babies Breath: How Do Babies Breathe in the Womb & Real Life
"You just wait until they take their first breath out here," my mother-in-law told me at my baby shower, casually stirring her sweet tea. "Before that, they just hold it for nine whole months." Bless her heart, she was dead...
What To Do With A Crochet Blanket For Newborn Babies, Y'all
I was exactly thirty-four weeks pregnant with my oldest, Tucker, sweating right through a floral maternity dress that felt more like a circus tent, when my Great Aunt Ruth handed me a massive, heavy, neon-yellow yarn afghan. Right on cue,...
The reality of personalized blankets with names for your baby
I was standing over a donation bin at three in the afternoon, aggressively stuffing a neon pink minky fleece throw into a plastic bag. It was a gift from a distant relative, given to me three months before my daughter...
Cincinnati Zoo Gladys Gorilla Baby Birth & Postpartum Chaos
It was 3:14 in the morning, I had a streak of questionable yellow spit-up drying on my left shoulder, and my oldest was throwing an absolute fit in the next room because his favorite dinosaur sock fell off in his...
Exactly How To Get Rid Of Baby Hiccups Without Losing Your Mind
Dear Sarah of four years ago. You're currently sitting in that cheap beige glider chair you bought on Facebook Marketplace. The one that aggressively squeaks every time you shift your weight. It's 3:14 AM. You're wearing Daveβs oversized college hoodie...
Dear Past Me: Please Put Down That Baby Percentile Calculator
Dear Jess from six months ago, You're currently sitting on the faded living room rug with a floppy yellow sewing tape measure in one hand and your phone in the other, furiously typing slightly inaccurate measurements into a baby percentile...
The Myth That Ruined My Newborn Days (And The Baby Orangutan Fix)
I was wearing Tom's vintage college hoodieβthe gray one with the mysterious yellow mustard stain from 2014βand it was somewhere around 3:17 AM. Maya was three weeks old and screaming like I'd personally offended her entire bloodline. I had a...
Why The Whole Infant Octopus Trend Almost Broke My Mama Sanity
I was standing at my kitchen island at 2:00 PM on a Tuesday, poking a slick, purple tentacle with a pair of tongs, questioning every life choice that had led me to this moment. My oldest son, Liam, was fourteen...
Dear Jess: Surviving the Baby in Yellow Phase (And Other Shocks)
Dear Jess from six months ago, You're currently sitting on the peeling linoleum of the downstairs bathroom at 3 AM, holding your three-day-old up to the harsh vanity lights, trying to figure out if you're sleep-deprived and hallucinating or if...