Lil Baby My Turn: Surviving The 3 AM Parenting Night Shift
I'm standing in our kitchen at 2:13 AM, bathed in the sickly yellow glow of the microwave clock, staring at a slightly damp muslin cloth while holding a bottle that's somehow simultaneously burning hot on the outside and completely freezing...
Lil Baby Real Name & The Glitch Of Naming Your First Human
The intake nurse stood at the foot of the hospital bed holding an iPad like a threat, her stylus hovering over a blank text field while the beeping of the fetal monitor mocked my indecision. My wife was exhausted, heavily...
Buying Lil Baby Tickets: The Great Airplane Lap Infant Lie
The seatbelt sign dings with that specific, mocking chime. I'm currently wedged into row 14B of an easyJet flight to Geneva, sweating through my jumper. Twin A is arching her back with the rigid intensity of a feral cat dodging...
The truth about finding the best baby stroller for your life
Sitting in the hospital breakroom at thirty-four weeks pregnant, chewing on generic ice chips, I received three completely conflicting mandates on how to transport a human infant. Sarah from the pediatric ward told me to buy the heaviest European luxury...
The Truth About Babys Breath Flowers in Your Newborns Nursery
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're standing in the craft store floral aisle, heavily pregnant, holding a thirty-dollar bundle of dried white weeds. You're convinced this is the final touch your nursery needs to tie the whole woodland aesthetic...
Surviving Year One: Letter To My Clueless Past Self (baby_jul1)
You're currently standing in the baby aisle of John Lewis, staring at a wall of breast pumps with the terrified, vacant expression of a man who has just been told an asteroid is hurtling toward Earth. I know this because...
Surviving the Absolute Chaos of Your First Real Baby's Out Day
I'm currently standing in the hallway holding a solitary, incredibly tiny sock. I've been standing here staring at the wallpaper for what feels like twelve minutes, entirely paralysed by indecision. I can hear one of my two-year-old twin daughters crying...
The Truth About Predicting Your Baby's Sex (And Baking Soda)
I was sitting cross-legged on the cold, unforgiving hexagonal tiles of our rental apartmentβs bathroom at 3 AM, wearing my husbandβs faded college sweatpants and holding a red plastic cup that contained a mixture of my own urine and Arm...
The Ugly Truth About Baby Yarn: What I Actually Learned the Hard Way
I'm sitting on the floor of my oldest boy's nursery at two in the morning, practically cross-eyed under the glow of a cheap ring light I bought for my Etsy shop, trying to use a pair of cosmetic tweezers to...