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The babies only survival guide for the newborn trenches
Listen. You're standing in the hospital parking lot, staring at a seven-pound human strapped into a car seat that looks like a NASA prototype, and you're realizing the discharge nurse actually let you leave. They just wheeled you out and...
So, are all babies born with blue eyes? What I actually learned
I was sitting in Mount Sinai hospital, room 412, wearing those horrific mesh underwear and a hospital gown that smelled vaguely of industrial bleach and desperation, holding my two-day-old son Leo. My husband, Dave, had just returned with the worst...
How to Build Your Amazon Registry Baby List Without Losing It
I was thirty-two weeks pregnant with my oldest, Beau, sitting on the faux-wood laminate floor of our tiny rental house, sobbing hysterically because the internet told me I needed a three-hundred-dollar wipe warmer. The nearest big-box store was a forty-five-minute...
Reading the Adriana Smith Baby Update at 2 AM Broke My Brain
It was 2:14 AM, the Portland rain was actively trying to dissolve my bedroom window, and I was holding my 11-month-old son while he slept. I had convinced myself he was developing some rare respiratory bug because my data tracking...
When Your 1-Month-Old Baby Refuses to Poop: A Twin Dad's Guide
It's 3:14 AM on a wet Tuesday in London, and I'm shining my iPhone torch directly into my daughter's nappy like an amateur archaeologist hoping to uncover ancient ruins. Nothing. Just a pristine, mocking landscape of dry bamboo fiber. Meanwhile,...
Dear Past Sarah: The Local Kids Store Is A Complete Trap
It's Tuesday, 10:45 AM, and you're currently sweating through your favorite grey Madewell tee while standing in the middle of that aggressively aesthetic boutique downtown. Your four-year-old, Leo, is lying starfish-style on the polished concrete floor, screaming something that sounds...
Why finding suntan lotion for newborns ruined my beach trip
It was 10:14 AM on a Tuesday in mid-July and I was already on my third iced coffee, which at that point tasted mostly like sand and sheer exhaustion. I was standing on a crowded beach in Florida wearing thick...
The Panic of Buying Sunblock Newborn Twins Can Actually Tolerate
Standing in aisle four of our local Boots, sweat pooling in the small of my back, I found myself staring at thirty-seven different brightly coloured bottles while two four-week-old girls actively lost their minds in a double buggy. The great...
Sorting Through the Utter Chaos of Buying Preemie Baby Clothes
I was standing at the hospital sink scrubbing my hands for the fiftieth time that Tuesday, staring at a crumpled plastic bag of tiny garments. My mom had just called to cheerfully suggest I just buy standard newborn sizes because,...