Magazine
The Data-Driven Dad’s Guide to Using an Online Kids Boutique
It was 2:14 PM on a Tuesday, and I was standing in aisle 14 of a massive big-box store under fluorescent lights that made my corneas throb. My wife, Sarah, was holding a pair of baby jeans the size of...
The ugly truth about kids clothes and my nachhaltige mode era
It was a Tuesday at 2 AM, and I was sitting on the floor of my microscopic apartment living room surrounded by three black garbage bags full of newborn clothes that smelled aggressively like a chemical factory. Maya was six...
The Ultimate Guide to Baby Größe: Making Sense of Tiny Clothes
I was wrestling my oldest, Carter, into a zippered footie pajama at two in the morning, practically sweating through my own shirt. He was technically four months old, and the little tag scratching the back of his neck proudly proclaimed...
Why Sustainable Kinder Kleidung Matters & How to Shop the Sale
It was 3 AM, and I was sitting on the floor of a nursery crying over a pair of newborn skinny jeans. My oldest son—who I swear was put on this earth purely to be my cautionary parenting tale—was screaming...
My Humiliating History With Kids and the Bulky Knit Sweater
It was November 2019, and I was standing outside a Trader Joe's in the freezing rain, wearing yoga pants that definitely had day-old oat milk latte spilled down the thigh. I was trying to wedge my screaming eighteen-month-old, Leo, into...
The Great Fever Myth: Surviving Your Zähne Baby's Worst Days
It’s 3:17 am, and I'm holding a plastic thermometer to my daughter Lily’s ear while she attempts to perform a violent exorcism on herself. The digital display flashes an angry red 39.5°C. For three days prior, my Swiss mother-in-law had...
The 3 AM Blowout: Finding A Baby Strampler That Actually Works
It was exactly 3:14 AM when the warmth hit my forearm. I was standing in the dark, swaying slightly, trying to burp a three-week-old infant who felt entirely composed of liquid and rage. The warmth was yellow, mustard-scented, and rapidly...
Finding the Best Kinder Spielzeug Without Losing Your Mind
It was 2:13 AM, I was carrying a barely-sleeping six-month-old, and my bare foot found the one object in the living room that doesn't just squeak—it sings a loud, unhinged, techno remix of "Old MacDonald" when you step on it....
Why I Attempted Babydecke Stricken (And Almost Lost My Mind)
My mother-in-law slapped a skein of neon acrylic on our kitchen island and told me it was indestructible. Three hours later, the guy at the local Portland yarn shop looked at me like I'd asked to poison the water supply...