Magazine

Tired mother staring at a baby monitor in a dark room

The midnight triage of baby sleep and staying remotely sane

Listen. It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in February, and the wind was howling off Lake Michigan loudly enough to rattle the bedroom windows. I was standing in the dark, holding a screaming four-month-old at arm's length because a...

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Tired father holding twin babies while looking exhausted in a dark nursery

The 3AM Cot Politician: Surviving the Baby Sleep Regression Ages

It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. The rain is lashing against our bedroom window in that specifically spiteful London way, and I'm standing in the dark watching my daughter Alice perform a flawless impression of a miniature, furious politician. She...

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Exhausted dad researching baby Sinclair sleep advice while holding a teething infant

The truth about baby Sinclair sleep advice and 90s dinosaurs

It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I've got cold, regurgitated milk drying on my left shoulder while attempting to type search queries into my phone with my nose. Florence is screaming because she's awake, and Matilda is screaming because...

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Exhausted mom holding a crying newborn in a dark nursery

Dear Past Me: Just Buy the Damn Baby Shusher and Go to Sleep

Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, It's 2:14 AM in your sister’s guest bedroom. You're wearing Dave's oversized Villanova hoodie that has a suspicious hardened crust on the left sleeve, and you're literally lightheaded from blowing air out of...

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A small green baby turtle resting on a wet rock under a UV heat lamp

Why Getting A Baby Turtle Is Actually A Terrible Idea For Kids

My index finger is pressed against the remarkably smudged glass of a terrarium at a strip-mall pet store in Beaverton, desperately trying to explain the concept of a "shell" to an 11-month-old who's currently attempting to eat my shoelaces. It...

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Rustic table display of practical party gifts for a baby celebration

The Truth About Baby Shower Party Favors People Actually Want

I was standing by the industrial trash can at the local VFW hall last weekend, double-fisting a lukewarm sweet tea and a paper plate of dry sheet cake, watching my cousin's friends secretly dump their party gifts. They were doing...

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Pregnant woman holding a coffee cup and laughing at a baby shower bingo card

Why Baby Shower Bingo Actually Saves the Entire Gift Opening Hour

"Don't do games, they're for basic bitches," my sister-in-law hissed at me across a lukewarm plate of mini quiches while balancing a mimosa on her hip. Then my mother leaned in, smelling heavily of Chanel No. 5 and unsolicited judgment,...

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A frustrated dad trying to put a tiny trainer on a toddler's squirming foot

How I Survived the Chaos of Measuring Tiny Feet

I'm currently holding a tiny, pristine canvas high-top in one hand and my daughter Maya’s fiercely clenched foot in the other. She is looking at me with the deep, pitying expression of someone watching a dog try to do long...

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A tired mom holding a silicone panda teether while her toddler dances in the living room

My Messy Guide to Surviving All Three Kinds of Baby Sharks

I'm standing in the downstairs bathroom at six in the morning, holding a plastic light-up dinosaur flashlight between my teeth, trying to pry my five-year-old's jaw open while he thrashes around like a feral raccoon trapped in a feed bin....

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