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The truth about baby play gyms and anhänger spielbogen
Three days after we brought my son home, my mother-in-law told me to hang bright gold bangles and noisy brass bells over his play mat to wake up his brain. An hour later, an influencer on my feed claimed that...
Predicting the Unpredictable: The Truth About Infant Eye Color
I was sitting under the punishing, flickering fluorescent lights of the NHS maternity ward, nursing a tepid cup of instant coffee, when Twin A finally opened her eyes and looked right at me. I had spent the better part of...
When Baby Dragon Saves the Dukedom: Surviving the Fantasy Stage
Listen, trying to negotiate with a toddler who has currently identified as a mythical fire-breathing reptile is a rookie mistake. I know this because I spent three full days last week trying to apply clinical logic to my two-year-old's sudden...
The Great Sippy Cup Betrayal: Finding A Safe Baby Cup That Works
I was sitting on my sister's beige sofa—and really, who buys a beige sofa when they've a toddler and a dog?—at Thanksgiving a few years ago when the great cup wars began. I was holding Leo, who was exactly six...
The Truth About Baby Cowgirl Boots (And My Epic Buying Mistakes)
It was October 2018. I was standing in my kitchen wearing a pair of violently mustard-colored corduroy overalls that I thought made me look like a cool Brooklyn mom but actually made me look like a giant toddler, chugging lukewarm...
The Truth About Baby Clams: A Panicked Parent's Feeding Guide
My mother-in-law firmly believes that giving any form of seafood to a child under the age of five will result in instant, spontaneous combustion. Meanwhile, a bloke I met at the playground in Greenwich—who was wearing barefoot shoes and feeding...
My Humbling Defeat to the Baby Bubble Romper: A Tech Dad's Guide
Tuesday, 2:14 PM. That was the exact timestamp on my smart home logs when I realized trying to wrangle rigid denim onto a screaming eleven-month-old is a foolproof way to break your own spirit. My wife was at a conference,...
The weird truth about keeping your infant son warm this winter
I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant, standing in a freezing Chicago parking lot, violently arguing with my mother on speakerphone about wool. She was convinced my unborn beta would instantly freeze to death the moment we left the maternity ward unless...
The Brutal Truth About $35 Baby Bamboo Pajamas: Are They Worth It?
I'm currently staring at four massive plastic bins in my attic labeled "0-6 Months," completely overflowing with stiff, cheap cotton zip-ups that my oldest son wore for exactly two and a half weeks each before his little sausage toes blew...