The NICU, My Sanity, And The Wild History Of The Coney Island Baby
3:17 AM. St. Jude's NICU. November. I was wearing my husband Dave's oversized grey hoodie that smelled distinctly like stale Dunkin Donuts and absolute panic, just sitting there staring at the translucent skin of my son Leo's tiny chest rising...
NICU Wardrobe Hacks: Dressing Your Preemie Without Breaking Things
I was standing next to an isolette that cost more than my first car, holding a microscopic, bright red fleece snowsuit my aunt had mailed us. The incubator was humming. The Philips monitors were doing that rhythmic, low-stakes beeping that...
The terrifying truth about having a nec baby in the NICU
It was 3:17 am on a Tuesday when the alarms changed their tune. Not the rhythmic, steady chirp of the standard heart monitor weβd grown intimately accustomed to over two weeks in the NHS neonatal unit, but a frantic, high-pitched...
The Conflicting Advice About Having A NICU Baby That Broke Me
I was standing by the ridiculously deep metal scrub sink at 3:14 AM when I realized I was completely, utterly paralyzed by other people's opinions. My mother-in-law had just texted me: Let her rest, touch overstimulates them right now. The...
The reality of bringing your preemie baby home from the NICU
The hospital sliding doors open and the winter wind hits your face. You're holding a plastic bucket seat containing a human the size of a standard bag of flour. They told you the discharge paperwork was clear and you could...
Sorting Through the Utter Chaos of Buying Preemie Baby Clothes
I was standing at the hospital sink scrubbing my hands for the fiftieth time that Tuesday, staring at a crumpled plastic bag of tiny garments. My mom had just called to cheerfully suggest I just buy standard newborn sizes because,...
What Nobody Tells You About Having A Premature Baby At 33 Weeks
It was three in the morning on a Tuesday when the bradycardia alarm went off. The overhead lights in the neonatal intensive care unit were that specific shade of hospital fluorescent that makes everyone look mildly deceased. I was staring...
The truth about kangaroo care and why itβs not just a photo op
The biggest lie we're sold about the immediate aftermath of birth is the glowing, serene Instagram photo where the mother, looking dewy and perfectly flushed, delicately holds her pristine newborn to her bare chest. Itβs framed as this beautiful, magical...
A Letter To My Past Self About Surviving An IUGR Baby Diagnosis
Dear Tom from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the windowless, overly warm scanning room at St Thomas' Hospital, entirely oblivious to the fact that your life is about to tilt on its axis. The NHS sonographer has...