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The Greasy, Panicked Truth About Infants and Bone Marrow
It was 6:45 in the morning and my kitchen smelled like a steakhouse that had just caught fire. I was standing over my stove in a nursing bra that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine since Tuesday, staring...
Dear Me: Put Down the Flashcards and Let Them Be a Baby Tiger
I'm standing barefoot on a rogue plastic dinosaur, staring at a laminated stack of mandarin flashcards I bought on the internet at two in the morning, while my three-year-old is using a half-eaten waffle to paint maple syrup across my...
The Lindbergh Baby Kidnapping: What Modern Parents Actually Learned
My mother-in-law told me to let him cry until he throws up because it builds character. My pediatrician, who looks like he hasn't slept since the Obama administration, muttered something about responsive attachment and vagus nerve development. Meanwhile, my favorite...
What Nobody Tells You About Having A Premature Baby At 33 Weeks
It was three in the morning on a Tuesday when the bradycardia alarm went off. The overhead lights in the neonatal intensive care unit were that specific shade of hospital fluorescent that makes everyone look mildly deceased. I was staring...
The Baby Platypus Taught Me More About Parenting Than Books
When it came time to figure out how we were going to explain the birds and the bees—or just basic mammalian biology—to our kid, I got three entirely different pieces of advice within a 24-hour window. My mother-in-law told me...
The Baby of the Year Contest Reality Check No One Gives You
My husband just walked into the kitchen and caught me hunched over my laptop like a sleep-deprived gargoyle, intensely scrolling through the baby of the year 2024 contestants pictures. I had half-drunk, room-temperature coffee dribbling down the front of my...
The Complete Chaos of Baby Lyrics and What Actually Soothes Them
My mother-in-law cornered me in the hospital recovery room to insist I strictly sing classical raagas if I wanted a smart child. Twelve hours later, the night nurse doing my vitals told me to skip singing entirely and just use...
The Truth About Buying a Baby Lion Costume for Your Kid
I was sitting in the third row of my Honda Odyssey in a Target parking lot, sweating through my favorite t-shirt, trying to peel my screaming six-month-old out of a baby lion costume that seemed to be actively melting into...
The truth about kangaroo care and why it’s not just a photo op
The biggest lie we're sold about the immediate aftermath of birth is the glowing, serene Instagram photo where the mother, looking dewy and perfectly flushed, delicately holds her pristine newborn to her bare chest. It’s framed as this beautiful, magical...