Dear Past Me: The Dreamland Baby Sleep Sack Is A Terrible Bug Fix
Dear Marcus from exactly six months ago, You're sitting in the glider chair right now, aren't you? It's 3:17 AM in Portland, the rain is aggressively smacking against the nursery window, and you're staring at your phone screen with the...
The Messy Truth About Pampers Baby Dry Diapers From A Tired Mom
It was 3:14 AM, the exact hour of the morning when your soul is the most tired, and I was holding my oldest son while a distinct, cold wetness seeped entirely through my favorite cotton pajama shirt. He was three...
The Great UPPAbaby Vista Debate: Is the V3 Upgrade Actually Better?
"Buy the Vista," my lead developer told me in the Slack channel where we usually complain about server loads. "It's the luxury SUV of strollers." Three minutes later, my sister-in-law texted: "Don't buy that massive thing, it's a total waste...
Stroller Shopping Destroyed My Sanity And Ruined My Spreadsheets
My mother-in-law insisted we needed a pram with shock absorbers lifted from a literal monster truck. My coworker Dave, who has three kids and hasn't slept a full night since 2018, swore we just needed a twenty-dollar nylon umbrella rig...
Dear Sarah: The Truth About The Viral Mabe Baby Carrier
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, You're sitting on the living room rug in those embarrassing gray maternity leggings you absolutely refuse to throw out, staring at a pile of beige linen and black buckles. You're on your third...
A Tech Dad's Review of the Baby Einstein Sea Dreams Soother
Last Tuesday, my mom told me to just leave the baby in the crib with a bottle of warm milk, my lead frontend developer swore I needed to strap a vibrating pad to the mattress, and a guy on TikTok...
What Nobody Tells You About the Amazon Baby Registry Welcome Box
I was sitting on my living room floor, ankle-deep in cardboard boxes and packing peanuts, sweating through my maternity shirt in the middle of a brutal Texas July. I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant with my oldest child—the one who's currently...
Why a Real Babys Day Out Requires a Massive Deployment Pipeline
I was standing by the open door of my Honda Civic, sweating through a flannel shirt in 60-degree Portland weather, holding a diaper bag that weighed roughly the same as a car battery. My 11-month-old son was strapped into his...
Troubleshooting Baby Potatoes: Air Fryers, Skins & Starch
I was wrist-deep in my eleven-month-old’s mouth, desperately trying to scrape a wet, glued-on piece of potato skin off his hard palate while he shrieked like a dial-up modem. My wife, carrying a laundry basket, froze in the doorway, took...