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Why I Completely Misjudged The Baby Shower Word Search As A Dad
I was sitting in a folding chair in our Portland backyard, balancing a paper plate of half-eaten potato salad on my knee, staring at a grid of 144 random letters on a piece of recycled cardstock. Across the yard, Sarah's...
How the Deko Babyparty Trend Saved Me From Pinterest Insanity
I was exactly thirty-six weeks pregnant with my oldest, Liam, standing on a wobbly dining room chair I definitely shouldn't have been on, trying to force a piece of cheap Scotch tape to hold up a massive, flimsy plastic banner...
The truth about motorisches spielzeug and your baby's brain
I was sitting on the living room rug with a butter knife. I was trying to pry the battery compartment open on a plastic singing avocado. The screw was stripped. The avocado was looping a song about the alphabet in...
The Baby Chick Temperature Chart (And Why I Stopped Checking It)
I was sitting on the edge of the guest bathtub at two in the morning, holding an infrared thermometer gun like a radar detector, pointing it directly at five day-old baby chicks huddled in a plastic storage tote. My wife...
The Great Baby Girl Wallpaper Debug: A Dad's Guide to Nursery Decor
I'm standing on a step stool at 11 PM with a plastic putty knife in my hand, frantically trying to scrape a semi-congealed layer of industrial adhesive off the drywall before it permanently bonds. My wife Sarah is standing in...
Debugging The Baby's Breath Garland Nursery Disaster
It's 11:43 PM on a Tuesday, and I'm standing on a step stool in my socks, gripping a heavy-duty staple gun in one hand and a crumbling, foul-smelling botanical structure in the other. My 11-month-old son is asleep in the...
Why navigating baby shower chair rentals nearly broke my spirit
It was pouring with rain, naturally, because this is London, and I was wedged firmly between our Victorian front doorframe and a fifty-seven-inch-tall wicker peacock chair. My wife, Sarah, who was approximately eight hundred months pregnant with the twins at...
Botanical Interests Organic Lettuce Mesclun Gourmet Baby Seed
I was standing in aisle four of the Pearl District Whole Foods, aggressively cross-referencing a bag of pre-washed spinach with the CDCβs active E. coli outbreak database on my phone, while my eleven-month-old actively tried to lick the shopping cart...
My Essential Baby and Toddler Equipment Lumolog Guide
I was exactly eight months pregnant with my oldest, sitting on the floor of what used to be my craft room, sobbing into a plastic wipe warmer. My husband had just spent three hours trying to assemble a baby swing...