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The Truth About Designer Infant Clothes and Scratchy Tulle
I was sweating straight through my postpartum mesh underwear in the back seat of a Ford F-150 somewhere on Highway 290, frantically trying to unfasten fourteen microscopic pearl buttons while my three-day-old newborn screamed like a banshee. It's funny how...
The Messy Truth About Why We Finally Switched To Silicone Bibs
Let me paint a picture for you. Itβs a random Tuesday in November 2017. Maya is six months old, and we're embarking on the mystical, terrifying journey of Baby-Led Weaning. I'm sitting on my kitchen floor at 2 PM wearing...
The truth about high-end baby presents and what parents want
The water in my bathroom sink was turning a very specific shade of neon yellow. It was three in the morning, my son Rohan was screaming from his bassinet with the raw, desperate lung capacity of a code blue patient,...
Why My Spreadsheet Strategy For Budget Baby Clothes Completely Failed
At 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, I was staring at a pivot table I'd built to calculate the exact cost-per-wear of an infant's wardrobe. My son was three months old at the time, and I was treating his closet like...
The Truth About That Huge Women Clothing Sale For Tired Moms
The right wheel of my double UPPAbaby stroller was jammed so hard against the slatted door of fitting room number three that I couldn't pry it open if there was a fire. I was standing there in a local boutique...
Building A Bulletproof Baby Depot For Surviving The Newborn Chaos
It was three in the morning in the dead of a Chicago winter when I finally lost my mind. I was standing in my living room holding a screaming infant, staring at a corner of the house that looked like...
That 3 AM Nightmare: Surviving a Wunder Po bei Babys at Home
3:14 AM. A Tuesday. I'm standing in the nursery wearing Dave's ridiculously oversized Villanova sweatpants with a mysterious yogurt stain on the knee, and ten-month-old Maya is screaming like I'm trying to actively murder her. It wasn't her normal "I'm...
Dear Jess: Stop buying the velvet holiday dresses for your baby
It's currently July, you're sweating completely through your maternity shorts in the hundred-degree Texas heat, and for some ungodly reason, you're scrolling the internet looking at a stiff, synthetic red velvet monstrosity with eighty-two sequins on it. I need you...
The ugly truth about that neon plastic baby play gym you just bought
I was sitting cross-legged on my living room rug at three in the morning, holding a screwdriver and weeping quietly over a piece of molded plastic that required four D batteries. The box promised it would stimulate my newborn's cognitive...