Magazine

A tired dad holding a newborn baby while looking at his smartphone in a dark room

What the bhad baby news taught me about newborn survival mode

The blue light from my phone was set to the absolute lowest brightness, but in the pitch black of our Portland bedroom at 3:17 AM, it still felt like staring directly into a laser pointer. My eleven-month-old daughter was asleep...

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Exhausted British dad holding twins and a stack of unhelpful baby manuals

The Myth of the Book Baby and Why My Twins Refused to Read It

At twenty past three on a damp Tuesday morning in our entirely too small London flat, I found myself holding a screaming infant in one arm while desperately trying to flip the pages of a sleep-training manual with my teeth....

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Tired dad holding a cup of hot coffee out of reach of twin toddlers.

The Burn Baby Burn Reality Check: Why Your Coffee is the Enemy

I'm currently standing in the exact centre of my kitchen, holding a mug of aggressively hot black coffee directly above my head like I'm presenting Simba to the animal kingdom, while two toddlers attempt to scale my pyjama trousers. This...

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A tired dad trying to keep up with his highly energetic dancing baby

Surviving the Kitchen Disco: The Truth About Your Dancing Baby

Before the twins arrived, I received three distinct, entirely contradictory pieces of unsolicited advice regarding music and infants. The frighteningly intense instructor at our antenatal class warned us that bouncing a child incorrectly to a beat could permanently traumatize their...

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Sarah holding a coffee cup while reading on a messy couch surrounded by scattered baby toys

Reading Detransition Baby Changed How I Look at Modern Motherhood

I'm literally sitting on my hideous green velvet sofa at 5:43 AM, aggressively scrubbing a splotch of hardened spit-up off the crinkly plastic dust jacket of a library book. I'm wearing my husband Mark’s oversized college sweatpantsβ€”the ones with a...

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A tired mom holding a clingy baby on her hip while trying to do household chores

Why Don't You Want Me Like I Want You Baby? (The Clingy Phase)

I was standing at the kitchen island yesterday, attempting to eat a cold piece of toast while packing up a stack of orders for my Etsy shop, when my grandmother dropped the classic line she always reserves for moments of...

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Priya sitting in a rocking chair holding a baby bodysuit

What Drake And Sophie Taught Me About Co-Parenting A Toddler

Dear Priya of last October. You're currently sitting on the cold bathroom tiles at 3 am. The baby is finally asleep in his crib after an hour of triage-level screaming, and you're stress-scrolling through celebrity gossip on your phone in...

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Tom's twin girls with slightly shiny but unchapped noses after applying organic balm

Why I Finally Caved to the Organic Baby Face Balm Craze

It’s Tuesday, somewhere around 3 PM, and I'm currently pinned to the nursery rug by a twenty-four-pound toddler who's thrashing her head side-to-side like a cornered badger to avoid the muslin cloth I’m wielding. Her twin sister is watching from...

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Tired dad holding an eleven month old baby while looking confused at a laptop screen showing sleep data

How to Actually Troubleshoot Your Way to an Fantastic Baby

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, the Portland rain was actively mocking my sanity against the bedroom window, and my 11-month-old was throwing a massive runtime error. I had tried the bouncing walk, the aggressive shushing, the weird yoga-ball-hip-sway...

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