Magazine
Where is Lil Baby From? Answering Your Kid's Hardest Questions
I was wrestling a shopping cart with a violently shaking left wheel through the Target clearance aisle, trying to decide if I really needed another wire basket to hold the junk I haven't sorted since Christmas, when my four-year-old yelled...
When To Have Baby Shower: A Mom's Blunt Guide To Timing It
I was standing in the middle of Aisle 4 at Target with a registry scanner gun in my hand, sweating profusely in a maternity cardigan that was clearly lying about being breathable, when my mom called to demand a date...
When Should Babies Start Talking? A Real Mom's Messy Timeline
I was sitting cross-legged on my faded floral living room rug, aggressively thrusting a plastic cow at my nine-month-old son, Wyatt, and loudly mouthing the word "MOOO" like a deranged person. He just stared at me, blinking slowly, probably wondering...
11-month-olddevelopmental milestonesgross motor skillsorganic baby clothesparenting anxietytummy time
When Should A Baby Start Crawling? A Dad's Messy Timeline
I was standing in line at a Portland coffee shop yesterday with my 11-month-old strapped to my chest like a very heavy, drooling backpack, when I got hit with three completely contradictory pieces of developmental advice in the span of...
Exactly When Does Baby Acne Go Away? A Tired Parent's Guide
I was sitting cross-legged on our hideous beige living room rug at 2:14 PM on a Tuesday, wearing maternity sweatpants that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine since my water broke. Leo was exactly three weeks old and...
The agonizing wait for a tiny flutter: early pregnancy heartbeats
I was staring at the acoustic ceiling tiles in room four of my obstetrician's office, counting the little perforated dots while trying to remember how to breathe. The transvaginal ultrasound wand is nobody's friend. It's basically a plastic joystick wielded...
When Do You Have A Baby Shower? A Dad's Guide to Timing
Dear Marcus from six months ago, You're currently sitting at your desk while the Portland rain hammers against the window, staring at a flashing cursor on a shared Google Calendar. You're trying to calculate the exact deployment window for a...
Exactly when do you feel baby kick: A very unscientific timeline
If you read the glowing, sepia-toned maternity forums, youβd think the very first time you feel a tiny foot move is a transcendent, magical event accompanied by a soaring acoustic guitar soundtrack. This is a spectacular lie. My wife was...
Panic vs reality: exactly when do babies start to talk anyway
I was sitting on the beige rug in my living room, aggressively holding a wooden block in front of my ten-month-old's face, enunciating the word block like I was teaching a hostage how to defuse a bomb. He just stared...