Why We Threw Out Our Teething Tablets (And What Actually Works)
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. The crib sheet was basically a swamp of drool, and I was frantically swiping through my phone with my left thumb while bouncing a screaming 6-month-old on my right hip. My brain was...
Debugging The Drool Firmware: When Do Babies Teeth Come In?
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and the Portland rain was actively mocking my sanity by drumming a steady, chaotic beat against the bedroom window. The baby, who usually just gives a polite little squawk when he wants milk,...
The Midnight Babi Meltdowns: Surviving Drool and Sleeplessness
Whatever you do, do NOT google "why are my kid's gums blue" at three in the morning. I was sitting on the edge of the glider in Maya's nurseryβthe gray one we bought off Craigslist that always squeaked if you...
Finding Rare Beanie Babies In The Attic (And Why I Panicked)
Dear Priya from last October. You're sitting on the concrete floor of your parents' garage in Naperville, surrounded by cardboard boxes that smell like old rain and mothballs. Your mom is upstairs texting you asking if you found the baby...
The 3 AM Teething Triage: Surviving the First Tooth
It was three in the morning, mid-January in Chicago, and the wind was howling off Lake Michigan. My toddler was thrashing in her crib like she was possessed, her sleep sack completely saturated with drool. I stood there running through...
The Search Query That Completely Ruined My Tuesday Night
My thumbs were hovering over the search bar at 3:14 AM, the harsh glare of my smartphone illuminating the spit-up stain on my shoulder. I was just trying to buy clothes. Specifically, I wanted our 11-month-old son to look less...
Dear Past Jess: A Survival Guide to the Teething Phase
Dear Jess from six months ago, who's currently sitting on the living room rug, staring blankly at a mountain of tiny socks while watching your youngest child gnaw aggressively on the wooden leg of the coffee table like a feral...