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Why That Ice-Solid Teething Toy Myth Needs to Die Immediately
It's 3 AM and you're staring into the abyss of your freezer. Next to the ancient bag of edamame and the breastmilk stash you're too paranoid to throw away, there's a plastic ring shaped like a starfish. It's frozen completely...
A Letter To Past Me About The Winter Onesie Sweater Situation
Dear Tom of six months ago. You're currently standing by the radiator in the front room of our freezing London flat, staring at your hands. The boiler is making that ominous clunking sound again, Alice is attempting to eat a...
The Puffy Coat Meltdown and the Magic of Toddler Boys Sweaters
It was 7:14 AM on a Tuesday, heavily sleeting, and I was standing in our driveway wearing one of my husband’s old flannel shirts that smelled faintly of stale coffee and desperation. Leo, who was three at the time, was...
Debugging the architectural nightmare of a newborn sweater set
I’m currently staring at a tiny, cream-colored cable-knit tube of fabric. My wife Sarah is in the other room, and my son is lying on the changing table, doing that terrifying infant stiff-board maneuver where every muscle in his three-week-old...
Why bamboo preemie clothes are the only thing you should pack
I'm standing at the warmer in bed spot four, untangling a mess of yellow and blue lead wires. The mother next to me is holding up a standard zero-to-three-month onesie that someone gifted her at a shower she barely got...
The Great Onesie Lie and Why Newborn Long Sleeve T Shirts Win
I'm standing in the nursery, it's like 3:14 AM, I'm wearing a nursing bra that smells vaguely of sour milk and Dave's oversized college sweatpants, and I'm practically in tears over three tiny metal crotch snaps. Before you've a baby,...
The Newborn Kimono Top: A First-Time Dad’s Troubleshooting Guide
My mom told me babies only need plain white onesies because that's what I wore and I survived with all my limbs intact. The aggressively hip barista at my local Portland coffee shop insisted I only use hand-woven hemp sacks...
The Great Layering Crash: Figuring Out Fall Baby Girl Outfits
We were in the back of my Subaru Outback in the Sauvie Island pumpkin patch parking lot, and my eleven-month-old daughter was emitting the thermal energy of a small sun. It was maybe 58 degrees outside. But inside the car,...
The 3 AM Panic That Forced Us Into the Sleeping Bag Baby Phase
It was 2:14 AM and my oldest son, Beau—who's now four and continues to be my living, breathing cautionary tale for literally everything—was screaming. Not his usual "I lost my pacifier" sleep-grunt. The kind of panicked scream that makes your...