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Baby Bowls Silicone: Troubleshooting The Night Spaghetti Won
6:14 PM, Tuesday. The ambient temperature in the kitchen was 68 degrees, but the marinara sauce slowly dripping down the bridge of my glasses was closer to 105. My eleven-month-old daughter had just executed a flawless physics demonstration right in...
Why A Wool Sleep Sack Fixed My Massive Midnight Laundry Problem
It was 3:14 AM, and I was standing in the dark over my oldest child’s crib with my hand shoved down the back of his pajamas, trying to figure out if he felt like a normal human boy or a...
Dear Past Me: The Honest Truth About Surviving With Baby Teethers
Dear Jess from October. You're currently standing in the kitchen at 3 AM in an oversized, spit-up covered baby tee, staring into the harsh fluorescent light of the open refrigerator. The baby is screaming loud enough to wake the dead,...
Finding the right babyspielzeug 6 monate: A zero-BS toy guide
My bare heel came down directly onto the plastic snout of a battery-operated farm animal at three in the morning. The thing didn't just break my skin. It triggered a motion sensor that immediately started blaring a chaotic, tinny rendition...
Finding the Best Infant Face Cream (A Letter to Past Me)
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the Target parking lot in your Subaru. It's raining. You have a lukewarm vanilla latte in the cup holder that you forgot to drink because you were too busy...
Spielzeug für 3-Jährige: Ein ehrlicher Survival-Guide
Meine Mutter rief gestern aus dem Nichts an und meinte, wir bräuchten für meine Nichte Clara sofort eine 1,50 Meter hohe Plastikküche mit elektronischen Brutzelgeräuschen, weil sie jetzt in "diesem Alter" sei. Unser Nachbar, dessen Kinder irgendwie immer aussehen, als...
Dear Past Marcus: The Skianzug Kinder Survival Guide I Wish I Had
Dear Marcus of exactly six months ago, currently staring blindly at a wall of synthetic winter gear at the REI in the Pearl District while Sarah texts you asking if you've found anything waterproof yet. I'm writing to you from...
The brutal truth about shopping a baby clearance warehouse sale
The wind off Lake Michigan was whipping my hair into my mouth while I stood in a line wrapping around an industrial park in Skokie. I was six months pregnant, freezing, and holding a lukewarm decaf coffee, waiting for the...
What I Got Wrong About The Humble Baby Teether
It was three in the morning and my daughter's chin looked like a slip-and-slide. She was chewing on my knuckles with the jaw strength of a pitbull, soaking right through her organic baby tee with a volume of saliva that...