That Time Stricken für Babys Made Me Cry Into My Cold Coffee
I was sitting on the floor of our living room in late November, wearing a pair of maternity leggings that had definitively given up on life around the thighs, surrounded by three balls of what the label aggressively called "ethereal...
The Truth About Knitting Baby Dresses (And Why I Still Do It)
It was 2019, Maya was exactly three weeks and two days old, and I was sitting on the floor of our extremely messy living room at 2 AM wearing sweatpants that smelled vaguely of sour milk. I had my lukewarm...
What I wish I knew about spielzeug für kleinkinder back then
I was sitting dead center on the rug in our tiny apartment living room, wearing yoga pants that I’m pretty sure had crusty sweet potato purée smeared on the left thigh from three days prior, just staring blankly at a...
Why Wooden Toys for a 1-Year-Old Might Actually Save Your Sanity
It's 5:42 am on a Tuesday, and I'm currently staring at a plastic farm animal that has been singing the same off-key rendition of 'Old MacDonald' for fourteen consecutive minutes. Maya has her tiny foot firmly planted on the cow...
The Truth About Retro Vintage T Shirts for Babies and Toddlers
My husband Dave was holding up a faded, paper-thin 1992 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt by two fingers, extending his arm as far away from his body as physically possible, like he was handling a radioactive diaper. We were standing...
Why The Baby Body Mit Kragen Saved My Sanity At Formal Events
I was standing in the aggressively marble-tiled bathroom of a ridiculously expensive chateau just outside Geneva, holding my screaming eight-month-old son at arm's length while my husband Dave frantically searched for baby wipes in a bag that only contained, for...
Premature babies and the sheer panic of size 44 clothing
There's a very specific, cold dread that washes over you when you attempt to put a standard newborn baby-grow onto a two-kilogram human. I was standing next to Twin A’s clear plastic hospital cot, entirely sleep-deprived and sweating through a...
A Letter to My Past Self About the Great Baby Bib Migration
Hey past Marcus. It's currently November, which means you're standing in the kitchen at 2 AM, holding a cloth that smells vaguely of sour milk, trying to calculate if it's physically possible for a five-month-old to output more fluid than...
The newborn rattle timeline from potato stage to blunt force trauma
I was standing in the kitchen at 4am, holding a plastic object that resembled a neon torture device, trying to work out why my three-week-old daughters were actively ignoring it. It was a Tuesday. Or possibly a Thursday. Time becomes...