Magazine
Why I Threw Out Most Of Our Learning Toys And What Actually Survived
It was exactly 4:13 AM on a random Tuesday in November, and I was wearing my husband Daveβs oversized college sweatshirt which had a highly questionable yogurt stain on the left shoulder. I was holding a lukewarm mug of yesterday's...
The Truth About New Baby Gifts (And Why I Burned a Cardigan)
Itβs late October 2017. I'm sitting on the edge of a remarkably uncomfortable IKEA glider in my dimly lit nursery, wearing a nursing bra that smells intensely like sour milk and sheer desperation. I'm holding my three-day-old daughter, Maya, who's...
Dear Past Priya: The Truth About Infant Car Seats
You're currently sitting on the garage floor in your maternity leggings. There's a half-eaten granola bar on the bumper of the Honda, the manual for the convertible seat is open to page forty-two, and you're quietly crying because the little...
A Portland Dad's Honest Guide to Picking Gifts for Infants
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday when our system completely crashed. My son had just executed a flawless, database-corrupting diaper blowout, and my wife and I were running on maybe ninety total minutes of fragmented sleep. The nursery thermostat...
What Parents Actually Want When You Buy Baby Gifts for Girls
My sister-in-law cornered me by the kettle just before the twins arrived, waving a mug of herbal tea, and firmly stated that I must only buy neutral organic linen so my girls wouldn't be forced into oppressive gender roles before...
Why The Best Baby Gifts For Boys Donβt Have Batteries Or Sirens
I'm currently sitting on my living room rug, surrounded by what I can only describe as a localized explosion of primary-colored plastic, wondering who decided that every single present for a male infant needs to simulate a construction site emergency....
Surviving Baby Clothing Stores Without Losing Your Damn Mind
It was 7:45 PM on a random Tuesday in 2016, and I was standing in aisle four of one of those massive, fluorescent-lit baby clothing stores, eight months pregnant with Maya, sweating through a mustard-stained maternity tank top. My husband,...
Raising A Baby Goth Without Losing Your Mind Or Your Aesthetic
The grand, sweeping myth of alternative parenting is that we're all gliding around dimly lit Victorian manors, raising miniature vampires who only listen to Bauhaus and politely refuse to play with brightly coloured plastic. The depressing reality is that I'm...
Dear Past Me: The Real Truth About Finding A Local Baby Cafe
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago. You're sitting in the passenger seat of your sister's 2018 Subaru Outback, wearing those black leggings with the tiny hole in the left knee, balancing a sweating, lukewarm half-caff iced Americano between your...