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Help! Baby Rolls Onto Stomach While Sleeping But Can't Roll Back
"Let them figure it out," my mother-in-law told me while aggressively stirring her Earl Grey tea in my kitchen, acting like infant survival was just character building. "Just roll him back immediately or he'll suffocate," the excessively perky mom in...
Why I Completely Misjudged The Baby Shower Word Search As A Dad
I was sitting in a folding chair in our Portland backyard, balancing a paper plate of half-eaten potato salad on my knee, staring at a grid of 144 random letters on a piece of recycled cardstock. Across the yard, Sarah's...
When Your Baby Squirrel Is Good At Everything (Except Sleeping)
It was a Tuesday. 2:14 PM. I was standing in my kitchen wearing black leggings that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine since the previous Thursday and a nursing bra that was basically just a loose suggestion of...
The Great "Baby Tana Porn" Autocomplete Disaster Of 2024
At exactly 7:14 PM last Tuesday, my wife stopped breathing. It wasn't a medical emergency, but rather a sharp, terrifying inhalation of pure, unfiltered judgment. We were sitting on the couch in our Portland living room, the rain aggressively attacking...
The "Baby Three" Elf Plush Trend is Actually a Nightmare
It’s 7:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I'm standing in my kitchen wearing my husband Dave's college sweatshirt that has a highly questionable yogurt stain on the sleeve. I'm clutching a mug of lukewarm French roast like it’s a life...
The Truth About Babia.to Elementor & Why Safe Baby Shopping Matters
So, when I first decided I was going to start a little side-hustle blog about pureeing vegetables—which, spoiler alert, lasted exactly three weeks before I remembered I hate cooking—I got completely conflicting advice from literally everyone in my life. My...
My Bamby Baby Store Wake-Up Call: Why I Stopped Hacking Gear
I was wedged upside down in the backseat of my Subaru Outback, rain streaking the windows, sweating through a t-shirt in forty-degree Portland weather. My phone was propped precariously on the center console, playing a grainy YouTube tutorial at 1.5x...
The 3 AM Meltdown That Made Me Finally Buy a Real Gum Teether
It was 3:17 AM in a freezing January, and I was sitting on the floor of my mother-in-law’s guest room in Connecticut wearing a stained pair of maternity sweatpants that I absolutely should have retired two years prior. Maya was...
How the Deko Babyparty Trend Saved Me From Pinterest Insanity
I was exactly thirty-six weeks pregnant with my oldest, Liam, standing on a wobbly dining room chair I definitely shouldn't have been on, trying to force a piece of cheap Scotch tape to hold up a massive, flimsy plastic banner...