Why I Stopped Buying the T Shirt Vintage Trend for My Babies
Let me set the scene for y'all. I'm standing in my laundry room at 11 PM on a Tuesday, up to my elbows in a bucket of warm saltwater and baking soda, trying to aggressively massage a 1989 Ninja Turtles...
The Truth About Retro Vintage T Shirts for Babies and Toddlers
My husband Dave was holding up a faded, paper-thin 1992 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt by two fingers, extending his arm as far away from his body as physically possible, like he was handling a radioactive diaper. We were standing...
Finding An August 3rd Beanie Baby: The Truth About Birthday Twins
It was exactly 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, I was wearing Daveβs grey college track pants with a crusty spot of peach yogurt on the left knee, and I was literally locked in a high-stakes bidding war with a stranger...
The Absurd Reality of Hunting for a December 9 Beanie Baby
My mother-in-law cornered me in the kitchen last Tuesday, holding a 1998 plush dragon by its tail like it was a dead rat. She informed me, with the solemnity of a war general, that placing any soft toy within a...
Why My Kid's Vintage Birthday Twin Toy Is Banned From The Crib
My wife Sarah caught me in the glow of my dual monitors at 2:14 AM, hovering my cursor over a "Buy It Now" button for a twenty-one-year-old stuffed tiger. I was holding our eleven-month-old in my left arm, furiously typing...
The Truth About That December 18th Beanie Baby From Your Mom
My mom lugged the giant, opaque Rubbermaid tub through my front door right as I was trying to unlatch a screaming newborn from my chest, kicking off her shoes and announcing that she had finally found my inheritance. It was...
The Truth About Getting a December 15 Beanie Baby for Kids
My mother-in-law cornered me by the diaper pail on Tuesday morning. "You absolutely must get him the Ty toy with his exact birthday to keep in his crib," she announced, waving a screenshot from some Facebook collector's group. Three hours...
The Hunt for a December 10th Beanie Baby Birthday Twin
At 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, I found myself in a heated eBay bidding war with a user named PlushQueen99 over a stuffed zebra from 2003. My daughter was asleep in the next room, the baby monitor glowing on my...
Why The January 27th Beanie Baby Birthday Hunt Almost Broke Me
It was 2:14 in the morning, and the blue glow of my phone screen was the only thing illuminating the massive pile of laundry I'd been ignoring for three days. I was frantically refreshing a sketchy auction page, my thumb...