When Do Babies See Color? (And Why My Newborn Hated Pastels)
I was standing in the middle of the nursery at two in the morning, wearing nursing pads that were definitely leaking, holding my three-week-old daughter Maya. I had just spent an embarrassing amount of money on this gorgeous, handcrafted, organic...
The Messy Truth About When Your Baby Finally Learns to Sit Up
I was sitting on the cold linoleum floor of a slightly damp church basement wearing yoga pants that hadnβt seen a yoga studio since Obama was in office, staring at a six-month-old named... Brayden? Jayden? Let's go with Jayden. Jayden...
Surviving the "Kill Me Baby" Phase Without Losing Your Mind
It's 3:14 in the morning and I'm standing barefoot in the kitchen, perfectly balanced on a rogue piece of Duplo that's currently attempting to pierce my heel bone. Twin A is upstairs executing a flawless impression of a faulty car...
Burt's Bees Baby Sizing Is Completely Unhinged And I Love It
It was exactly 2:14 AM. I know this because the glowing red numbers on the cheap digital clock my husband insisted we keep in the nursery were burning a hole into my retinas. Maya was four months old, screaming like...
Why 90% of cute baby clothes are complete structural disasters
It was 3:14 AM, I had a small flashlight clamped between my teeth, and I was sweating profusely while trying to line up seven asymmetrical metal snaps on a pair of corduroy infant overalls. My son, Leo, who was three...
The Truth About the Baby Steps Game Uncensored Search Trend
I'm sitting on the floor of our extremely cramped London living room, scraping a substance that might be mashed banana (but is almost certainly worse) off my left knee, when my phone buzzes with a frantic text from my sister....
Why Your Strict Baby Sleep Schedule Is A Complete Disaster
It was three in the morning on a Tuesday, and I was rage-scrolling a spreadsheet I had color-coded for my six-week-old son's naps. He was in the bassinet next to me, screaming like I had just insulted his ancestors, completely...
Why The Great Baby Oatmeal Cereal Incident Finally Broke My Spirit
It's 11:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I'm staring at a perfectly spherical glob of beige paste slowly sliding down my otherwise immaculate kitchen window. It hangs there for a moment, defying gravity, before dropping directly onto the cat's head....
Troubleshooting Your Grinch Baby When Holiday Chaos Hits
I'm currently sweating through my favorite flannel shirt while attempting to stuff my eleven-month-old son into a synthetic, neon-green elf costume that has actual jingle bells aggressively sewn onto the collar. He is thrashing around like a fish on a...