Megan Walerius, Birth Plans, and the Chaos of Expectations
When we announced the twins were on the way, I received three distinct pieces of advice within a forty-five-minute window at my local pub. My mother, clutching a small glass of sherry, told us to simply let nature take its...
The disaster of picking a baby boy easter outfit
It was ten in the morning on a Sunday and I was staring at a mustard-yellow blowout that had completely breached the hull of a forty-dollar miniature linen suit. My mother-in-law was knocking on the powder room door, asking if...
Spare Ribs vs Baby Back Ribs: A Dadβs Guide to Debugging Toddler BBQ
I was standing at the meat counter of our neighborhood New Seasons in Portland, panic-googling whether "baby back" meant the ribs actually came from a baby pig. My wife Sarah was three aisles over dealing with a minor avocado-related meltdown...
The Honest Truth About Your Baby Dedication (And Surviving It)
Let me paint a picture for y'all. It's Sunday morning, roughly 10:15 AM. I'm sitting in the second pew, sweating clean through my nice silk blouse, while my oldest sonβwho was supposed to look like a literal angel from heavenβis...
When Do You Actually Stop Burping a Baby? An Honest Dad Guide
Dear Tom from six months agoβor rather, let's cast our minds all the way back to the dark trenches when the twins were tiny, because time is a flat, milk-stained circle and my trauma has simply manifested as a letter...
What to Do When Your Kid Finds a Baby Squirrel in the Yard
"Drop the Similac, Tucker!" I yelled across the patio, lunging over a scattered pile of wooden blocks while clutching a squirming newborn to my chest. My oldest sonβbless his animal-loving, highly impulsive heartβwas kneeling in the damp Bermuda grass, holding...
When Can You Find Out the Gender of a Baby? A Messy Guide
When I was barely six weeks pregnant with Leo, sitting at a lukewarm brunch while desperately trying not to hurl into my overpriced oatmeal and clutching my third decaf coffee like a lifeline, I got three entirely different timelines for...
The Great BBQ Debate: Ribs and Baby-Led Weaning
Summer in Chicago means the lake breeze is sticky and someone is always firing up a smoker in a park. We were at a family cookout near Montrose Beach last July when my husband's uncle handed my eight-month-old a massive,...
Sorting Out the Mess: Are Jelly Babies Safe for Your Toddler?
So there I was at our big family barbecue last Sunday, balancing my six-month-old on my hip while trying to wrangle my toddler away from the sprinkler, when the contradictory advice started rolling in. My mom, bless her heart, told...