Magazine

A tired dad trying to drink tea while twins dismantle the living room

The myth of the peacefully occupied infant (and how to survive a bu...

I currently have one foot planted firmly on a rogue piece of Tupperware, while the other is trying to gently slide a half-eaten rice cake out from under the sofa before the dog finds it. The twins, at two years...

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The Great Naked Baby Rebellion: Surviving Twin Toddler Nudity

It's 7:14 AM, and the unmistakable sound of bare feet slapping against the cold hardwood floor echoes down the hallway. I'm standing near the radiator holding a pair of tiny corduroy trousers that cost more than my first car, watching...

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A tired father holding two identical twin baby girls in his living room

The Oh Baby Illusion And The Messy Reality Of Your First Year

I was standing in the kitchen at half-past three in the morning, staring blankly at the leftover winnie the pooh baby shower invitations still pinned to our fridge. They were beautiful, really. Pristine cardstock, muted pastel colours, a delicate little...

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Tom Selleck holding an infant next to modern safe sleep cot guidelines

Watching Three Men And A Baby At 3AM Will Not Calm Your Nerves

Dear Tom of six months ago. You're currently sitting on the sofa in the pitch dark. It's 3:14 AM. You have one twin asleep on your left shoulder, drooling a thick, milky substance onto your only clean t-shirt, and the...

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A tired dad looking defeated while holding a bowl of sweet potato puree.

Dear Past Tom: The chaotic truth about cooking meals for babies

Dear Tom from six months ago, You're currently standing in the kitchen at two in the afternoon, wearing a jumper that smells faintly of sour milk, staring at a blender full of steamed sweet potato. You have a very specific,...

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A baby dog looking confused at a Kianao wooden play gym

The Brutal Reality of Mixing Tiny Puppies and Newborn Twins

I'm standing in our narrow London hallway, holding a slightly stiff hospital blanket that smells intensely of NHS-grade floor cleaner and sheer panic. Page 47 of a highly-rated parenting manual told me I should present this artifact to our terrier...

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A tired father carrying twin girls in a park comparing their behavior to a wild primate

What a Wild Baby Chimp Taught Me About Raising Twin Toddlers

I'm currently lying flat on the rug in our London living room, staring at a patch of ceiling that desperately needs painting, while someone repeatedly hits my left shin with a plastic spatula. Twin A (Isla) is shrieking because her...

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Tom's kitchen counter dominated by bottles and the large baby brezza machine

Note to past Tom: Getting the baby brezza sterilizer sorted

Dear Tom of six months ago, It's currently 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I know exactly what you're doing. You're standing in the kitchen in your oversized grey joggers, staring bleary-eyed into a rolling boil of tap water on...

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Messy flatlay baby announcement with organic cotton onesies and a positive test

The Great Flatlay Disaster: Twin Baby Announcement Ideas

The ultrasound gel was alarmingly cold, but that wasn't what made me stop breathing. It was the sudden, incredibly protracted silence from Janet, the NHS sonographer who had been cheerfully chatting about her spaniel just moments before. She squinted at...

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