Magazine
How the xiaoxia-baby webcam recorded my worst parenting moment
My mother-in-law firmly believes that baby monitors emit a mysterious frequency that turns infants into sleeper agents. My mate Dave, who treats fatherhood like a tactical military operation in hostile territory, insisted I needed a Β£300 dual-band Wi-Fi camera with...
Debugging The Baby Don't Be Bald Panic At Two In The Morning
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday when I found myself hovering over the crib, shining my iPhone flashlight directly onto the back of my 11-month-old son's head. I was trying to measure the exact radius of the bald spot...
The Cucumber Protocol: From Slippery Hazards to Teething Hacks
It's 6:15 AM in our Portland kitchen, and I'm staring at a cutting board with a digital caliper in my hand. My wife, Sarah, is pouring her coffee, watching me measure a wet green vegetable down to the millimeter. "It...
How I completely debugged our library of baby books for girls
It's 2:14 AM on a Tuesday. I'm sitting cross-legged on the nursery floor, surrounded by a mountain of glossy cardboard. My wife, Sarah, is blissfully asleep down the hall, and our 11-month-old daughter is currently executing a sleep cycle that...
Why We Tore Down The Nursery Walls At 3 AM For Blue Paper
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was staring at a wall painted a shade the DIY shop had optimistically called 'Sunshine Morning' but which, in the harsh glow of a dimmable nightlight, looked more like 'Aggressive Custard'....
Baby Back vs St Louis Ribs: Surviving The Family BBQ With Toddlers
My brother-in-law's backyard in Naperville smelled like hickory smoke and impending disaster. I was holding a lukewarm paper plate of potato salad while watching my toddler, who was wearing nothing but a diaper, aggressively gnaw on a piece of barbecued...
From Fragile Newborn To Full baby_gopn1k
I found Maya in the kitchen at 6:13 AM this morning, squatting perfectly on her haunches in the corner by the bin, wearing a matching velour tracksuit and aggressively chewing on a teething rusk like it was a cheap cigar....
The myth of the aesthetic baby suji bowl and what to do instead
Scraping hardened semolina off the ceiling fan wasn't exactly what I pictured when my mother-in-law told me suji would be the perfect first food for my son. I'm standing on a dining chair with a butter knife, chipping away at...
Why The Sit To Stand Infant Scooter Is A Major Motor Update
For the last eleven months, I operated under the assumption that tiny children on wheels were basically just tiny teenagers, meaning I had at least five years before I needed to worry about wheeled mobility devices. I was sitting at...