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Dear Past Me: Stop Googling "Baby Chicks For Sale" Before You Read ...
You're standing in aisle four of the farm supply store. Itβs April. You're wearing those black leggings with the mysterious crusty yogurt stain on the left knee, balancing a rapidly melting iced oat milk latte against your hip, while Mayaβwho's...
Why I'm Stealing Millie Bobby Brown's Top Secret Parenting Rule
I just spent forty-five minutes frantically deleting old Facebook albums from 2019 while my toddler tried to climb the dishwasher, and let me tell y'all, the panic sweat was real. I was looking at my oldest son's digital footprint, and...
The Reality of Fitting a Baby Grand Piano in a House with Toddlers
I'm currently on my hands and knees in the lounge, holding one end of a metal tape measure while Maya, who's two, tries to eat the other end. Her twin sister, Lily, is repeatedly smashing a wooden spoon against the...
What The Bhad Bhabie Cautionary Tale Teaches Modern Parents
Listen. Last week, my mother-in-law told me I should delete every single photo of my toddler from the internet because the world is entirely composed of predators. The next morning, a fellow nurse at the clinic insisted I need to...
The 3 AM Baby Powder Disaster That Changed Our Diaper Strategy
The humidity monitor in the nursery read exactly 46 percent, but it felt like a humid jungle as I wrestled my 11-month-old at 3:14 AM. He was furious. He had a diaper rash that looked like angry topography, and I...
What the Heck is a Sugar Baby (And Why My Kitchen is Sticky)
I was standing at my kitchen island yesterday, scraping dried oatmeal off the counter with a thumbnail while trying to fulfill three Etsy orders for custom nursery signs, when I nearly dropped my phone into a lukewarm mug of coffee....
The hostage negotiation of the sorry baby apology milestone
The soft rubber block bounced directly off my collarbone and landed in my lukewarm coffee. It splashed onto my only clean pair of leggings. My two-year-old stood across the living room, chest heaving, waiting for the fallout. I looked over...
Why My First Stair Gate Was a Complete Disaster and Other Confessions
I dropped an entire basket of freshly folded onesies right at the bottom of the steps when I saw it. My oldest son, Carterβwho's now five and still the absolute poster child for why I've gray hairβwas nine months old...
Why We Need To Talk About The Nepo Baby Meaning In Parenting
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the living room floor at two in the morning with three laptops open. You're hitting refresh on the Lincoln Park cooperative preschool waitlist portal. You think if you just email...