Magazine

A tired British dad attempting to swaddle screaming twin girls at 3am using an organic cotton blanket.

The Drowsy But Awake Deception and Other Newborn Survival Lies

I was halfway through singing a deeply out-of-tune rendition of 'Wonderwall' to a tiny human who was aggressively trying to headbutt my collarbone when I realised the greatest lie ever sold to modern parents. It was 3:17 am, Twin A...

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Mother holding baby in organic cotton bodysuit during church dedication

The Honest Guide to Surviving Your Baby's Dedication Service

We were standing in the third row of padded chairs, and my daughter was aggressively gnawing on a damp church bulletin. The pastor was three sentences into a long prayer about spiritual legacy, and all I could think about was...

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Dad holding baby while researching true crime on laptop

Did Ed Gein Kill The Baby Sitter? A Dad's Late-Night Search

11:43 PM. The glow of the television is casting a sickly blue light across our living room, illuminating an abandoned silicone teething ring and a half-drank bottle of formula. Sarah is asleep on the couch, her head resting at an...

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A dad looking confused while tangled in a long fabric wrap holding a baby

Why Most Baby Carriers Fail Dads and How We Finally Fixed It

Listen, I thought I was being a supportive, eco-conscious wife when I bought us a matching organic linen ring sling. It was a brisk April morning in Chicago, and I stood on our front porch watching Amit in the driveway....

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A confused parent searching for organic infant clothing and finding craft whiskey

Hudson Baby Bourbon: The Nursery Mixup and Parenting Nightcaps

Listen. Don't show up to my cousin's baby shower in Naperville with a bottle of 92-proof craft whiskey just because you typed the registry name into your phone too fast. I've seen a thousand wild things during my shifts on...

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Exhausted mom in a messy bedroom staring at a baby waking up in a small bedside bassinet.

How Long Can A Baby Sleep In A Bassinet Before You Lose It

Dear Sarah from exactly four years and six months ago, It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. You're wearing Dave’s stained college lacrosse t-shirt, the one with the hole near the left armpit, and you've literally been staring at Leo for...

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A vintage Beanie Baby sitting safely on a high shelf out of reach from a baby

A Note From The Future About That October 6 Beanie Baby Idea

Dear Marcus from six months ago, you're currently hovering your cursor over the "Buy It Now" button on eBay at 2:14 AM while your five-month-old is finally asleep after what felt like a system-wide hardware failure. You've just discovered that...

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Marcus playing acoustic version of lil baby gunna - close friends chords for his baby

Why I Learned Trap Music Guitar Chords for a Crying Infant at 3 AM

Dear Marcus from six months ago, It's currently 3:14 AM, the relentless Portland rain is hammering against the nursery window, and you're standing in the middle of the room wearing boxer briefs, holding your dusty acoustic guitar like it's a...

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Stressed mom holding baby and checking concert tickets on phone

Why Buying Lil Baby Concert Tickets For a Baby is a Bad Idea

It was 9:15 PM in section 204 of the arena. My phone was open to a decibel-reading app I had downloaded in a panic in the parking lot, and the screen was just flashing the word "DANGEROUS" in bright red...

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