Magazine

A dad holding a tape measure at a potential baby shower venue in a modern cafe.

Debugging Baby Shower Venues: A Portland Dad's Honest Breakdown

My mother-in-law cornered me by the fridge to say the party absolutely had to happen in a formal tea room with finger sandwiches and little forks. Two hours later, my lead developer sent a Slack message insisting we just host...

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Priya handing her toddler to a babysitter while holding a medical checklist

Finding a baby sitter near me without losing my mind

I'm standing in my own hallway, wearing hard pants for the first time in eight months, watching a nineteen-year-old named Chloe hold my son. She is holding him like a football. A fragile, screaming football. My husband is whispering that...

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My toddler hiding from thunder under a Kianao organic blanket.

Processing the Baby Storme News While Riding Out a Real Storm

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was wedged between a vacuum cleaner and a giant cardboard box of winter coats in our windowless hallway closet, trying to keep a four-year-old, a two-year-old, and a four-month-old quiet while...

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A bewildered grandparent holding a modern baby item while a tired dad looks on

The Baby Boomers Age Range: Why Grandparents Think We're Neurotic

"Put a spot of whiskey on their gums," my father-in-law suggested casually, sipping his tea while watching Twin A attempt to violently gnaw her way through our oak coffee table. Later that same Tuesday, my mother informed me via text...

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A deeply tired father doing a desperate midnight sway in the kitchen

The Desperate Midnight Baby Boo Dance That Saved My Sanity

The linoleum of my kitchen floor is particularly hostile at 3:42 AM, a fact I was contemplating while aggressively swaying left-to-right with a screaming twin strapped to my chest. My shirt was damp with something I desperately hoped was only...

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A deeply tired dad holding a baby boy while attempting to make instant coffee

Raising a baby boi: When people expect a tiny, burly lumberjack

I'm currently holding my mate Dave’s six-month-old son at arm's length, waiting for the inevitable geyser of urine to subside. When you've twin girls, as I do, you get used to a certain radius of danger during nappy changes. With...

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An exhausted dad holding a baby outside Baby Blues Luncheonette in Brooklyn

How We Survived Baby Blues Luncheonette With An 11-Month-Old

We're standing on an uneven patch of Brooklyn concrete at 10:34 AM, and I'm sweating through my flannel shirt while trying to pretend I belong here. Inside the massive glass window, a guy in a vintage beanie is slowly, methodically...

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A frustrated toddler sitting on mulch wearing unlaced baby blue Jordans and holding a Kianao blanket.

Why I Regret (And Still Love) Buying Baby Blue Jordans For My Kid

It was Tuesday, 2:14 PM, and the sun was absolutely baking the squishy rubber flooring at Centennial Park. I was wearing leggings that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine since Sunday and an oversized Nirvana tee with a...

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A mom inspecting a baby blanket for spiders in a garage

That Time I Found a Baby Black Widow in My Garage Nursery Stash

I was elbow-deep in a cracked Sterilite tub, breathing in that stale, hundred-degree Texas garage air, when a little pale thing dropped out of my oldest son’s 2T winter sweater. It didn’t look like much of anything at first. It...

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