Magazine

A realistic modern baby nursery with neutral colors and a bare crib next to a half-empty coffee cup

Chasing the Pottery Barn Baby Dream Without Losing Your Mind

When I was seven months pregnant with Maya, I was a walking target for unsolicited opinions. I remember my mother-in-law cornering me at my own shower, wearing this aggressively floral blouse, and insisting I needed to buy a massive, heavily...

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Exhausted dad holding newborn twins in the middle of the night

Why the Sparkle Megan Baby Drama Hits Hard for Exhausted Dads

It was 3:14 AM on our second night home from the hospital, and I was holding a cold, wet wipe in my teeth while trying to untangle a tiny, thrashing leg from a heavily soiled sleep sack, desperately hoping my...

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Portland dad holding an eleven-month-old baby otter in a community swimming pool wrapped in a towel.

Debugging Infant Water Safety and the Sea Otter Parenting Method

I'm currently losing a wrestling match with a wet, angry noodle on a bench that smells aggressively of bleach. My eleven-month-old son has somehow managed to triple his body weight purely through the physics of being slippery, and the acoustic...

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Exhausted dad staring at a glowing baby monitor smartphone app in the dark

Why I Cannot Stop Staring at the Night Vision Baby Monitor

It's 3:14 AM, and the blue light of my smartphone is the only thing illuminating our bedroom ceiling. My wife is completely unconscious next to me, breathing in a steady rhythm that I deeply envy. Meanwhile, I'm zoomed in 400x...

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A confused dad looking at a tiny baby roach on the kitchen floor.

The 3AM Kitchen Intruder: Dealing With Baby Roaches

It was 3:14 AM, and I was doing something I explicitly knew I shouldn't be doing. Maya, who's two years old but possesses the demanding palate of a Michelin-star food critic, refused to go back to sleep unless her milk...

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A VTech baby monitor screen showing a sleeping baby in a dark room.

The Great VTech Baby Monitor Experiment (A Dad's Honest Take)

I spent the first three months of my twin daughters’ lives doing exactly what you shouldn’t do: I bought a terrifyingly cheap, unbranded camera off the internet that broadcasted grainy, unencrypted footage of my children directly to, presumably, a server...

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Mother looking concerned at a baby resting in a plush newborn lounger pillow

The ugly truth about baby loungers and your precious sleep

I was sitting in my living room last Thanksgiving when my sister-in-law proudly whispered that her newborn had been asleep for three hours in one of those plush, overstuffed infant nests on the sofa. She looked at me like she...

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Exhausted dad sweating in a hallway while trying to stuff a thrashing toddler into a winter snowsuit.

Winter With Twins: A Freezing Dad's Guide to Infant Layering

Dear Tom of six months ago. You're currently standing in the narrow, draughty hallway of our Victorian terrace, sweating profusely through your jumper while trying to stuff Evie's left arm into a fleece-lined snowsuit. Isla is already dressed and currently...

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A tired mom holding coffee looking at a baby sleeping safely on their back on an organic cotton playmat.

Why the Baby Got Back Lyrics Actually Make Terrible Parenting Advice

2:14 AM. Tuesday. I'm wearing Dave's old college sweatpants with a mysterious, crusted-over yogurt stain on the knee, desperately bouncing a screaming three-week-old Leo while whisper-rapping the words to Sir Mix-a-Lot in the dark. You know the exact scene from...

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