The spreadsheet reality of picking baby boy names with J
I'm sitting at the kitchen island at 2am, staring at a deeply neurotic Excel spreadsheet colour-coded by syllable count. This was three years ago, roughly halfway through my wifeβs pregnancy, before the NHS ultrasound technician cheerfully announced "itβs two girls,...
The Huge Baby Bouncer Myth I Totally Believed With My First Kid
It was a Tuesday in 2017, and I was wearing a pair of black maternity leggings that had a distinct smear of Greek yogurt crusted onto the left knee. Maya was three months old. I was standing in my kitchen...
How to Take Good Newborn Photos Without Losing Your Damn Mind
I was sweating through my third nursing tank of the day, teetering on a dining room chair with my iPhone hovering over my oldest son, Leo, who was currently screaming his head off in a hand-knitted Yoda costume my mom...
Why I Finally Stopped Fighting the Whole Pastel Baby Pink Phase
It was late October 2017, and I was standing in the middle of Target wearing a heather-gray maternity sweater that smelled faintly of the iced Americano I had spilled down my front three hours earlier. I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant...
The Truth About Those Perfect Baby Playing Quotes I Used To Hate
It was exactly 3:14 AM. I know this because the glowing green numbers on our cheap digital alarm clock were basically burning holes into my sleep-deprived retinas. I was sitting in the grey nursing glider we bought off Craigslistβthe one...
Surviving the Baby Porcupine Phase (A Letter to My Past Self)
Dear Sarah from six months ago, You're currently sitting on the cold tile of the downstairs bathroom. Itβs 2:14 PM on a Tuesday, youβre wearing those tragic gray sweatpants with the bleach stain on the left thigh, and you're hiding...
The Babies R Us Registry Panic: A Letter to My Anxious Past Self
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the driverβs seat of your Subaru in the parking lot of a Kohlβs, wearing those black leggings that have the weird hole near the knee, and you're literally vibrating...
The Viral Baby Rasta Drama & The Truth About Public Meltdowns
I was standing in aisle four of our local H-E-B last Tuesday, balancing a jumbo pack of overnight diapers on my left hip while my two-year-old practically levitated out of the shopping cart, screaming at a pitch only dogs and...
When Your Infant Becomes a Baby Rhino: A Hip Dysplasia Guide
I'm currently sitting on my living room rug surrounded by a mountain of expensive zippered cotton, trying to figure out how to shove a piece of rigid medical plastic inside a sleep sack without waking a sleeping infant or snapping...