The clinical and emotional reality of dead babies in our world
Before I had my own kid, I thought I understood how the worst-case scenario worked. I used to sit in the pediatric ICU breakroom at three in the morning, drinking lukewarm coffee out of a styrofoam cup, charting the vital...
Surviving Our Real Boss Baby and Who Actually Voices The Movie
My mom told me that if I didn't establish dominance on day one, the baby would rule our house forever. The barista down the street confidently informed me that I need to surrender to his flow and let the infant...
Finding A Sugar Dating Platform On My Niece's Phone Broke My Brain
There I was, elbow-deep in a laundry basket of spit-up stained onesies on my back porch, trying to untangle a rogue sock from my toddler's overalls while swatting away Texas mosquitoes. My nineteen-year-old niece was visiting from college and had...
Surviving The Boss Baby 2: A Parent's Deeply Unqualified Guide
Before we hit play on a Saturday afternoon, I received three entirely distinct pieces of advice about this film. My sister-in-law, who curates her childrenβs wooden toy collection by color, warned me it was corporate propaganda designed to rot the...
2AM Internet Spirals and the Tragic Baby Emmanuel Haro Case
It was exactly 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting on the freezing cold kitchen tiles in Dave's faded Penn State hoodie, aggressively scrolling my phone. Leo, my four-year-old, was finally, mercifully asleep after waking up screaming because...
Surviving Backyard Baby Chicks When You Already Have A Toddler
We were standing in the middle of a farm supply store somewhere in the Illinois suburbs when my husband decided we needed to teach our two-year-old about food sustainability. He was holding a cardboard box that vibrated with high-pitched chirps,...
The brutal truth about making baby back ribs in oven setups with a ...
There's a persistent delusion in modern parenting that you either cook elaborate organic meals while baby-wearing, or you survive entirely on leftover goldfish crackers and despair. The internet wants you to believe that making proper barbecue requires a custom outdoor...
Trump Baby Boomers Approval Rating: A Real Parent Survival Guide
Don't try to explain macroeconomic policy to your father-in-law while your toddler is currently trying to shove a fistful of buttered mashed potatoes up his own nose. Just don't do it. I learned this the hard way last Thanksgiving, standing...
The Real Shiva Baby Dilemma: Taking Infants to Solemn Events
"Leave 'em at the house," my grandma told me over the phone, her voice crackling through the spotty rural Texas cell service. "Take them, babies represent the circle of life!" my mother-in-law insisted the very next day while aggressively shoving...