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Surviving the Baby Boomer Years of Grandparenting
Don't, under any circumstances, politely accept the garbage bag full of your own crusty childhood stuffed animals just because your mom has misty eyes. I did this when my oldest was born, and let me tell you, it was a...
Baby Shower Games That Won't Make Your Guests Cringe
I was thirty-five weeks pregnant with my oldest, feet swollen into the shape of overcooked sausages, sitting on a floral armchair in a rural Texas living room while my mother-in-law's friend Brenda aggressively inhaled a microwaved Snickers bar smeared inside...
My 3 AM Million Dollar Baby Obsession
It's 2:47 AM on a Tuesday. I'm sitting on the nursery floor wearing a hoodie that smells faintly of regurgitated sweet potato, trying to rock one of my twin daughters back to sleep while her sister aggressively kicks the cot...
The brutal truth about picking baby names that won't ruin them
My mother-in-law cornered me in the kitchen at twenty weeks pregnant to gently suggest that our child's name needed to reflect our deep ancestral roots. Later that afternoon, my hipster neighbor in Logan Square casually mentioned over the fence that...
Mein absurder Kampf mit Fast Fashion und warum ich fast alles wegge...
Es war 2 Uhr morgens, ich trug eine graue Jogginghose, auf der undefinierbare, verkrustete SΓΌΓkartoffel-Brei-Reste klebten, und starrte auf einen gigantischen Berg von Babyklamotten. So richtig grelle, chemisch riechende Neondinosaurier-Strampler aus Poly-irgendwas und Hosen, die sich anfΓΌhlten wie aufgeweichtes Plastik....
Why our pediatrician vetoed the freezer and pushed a beissring holz
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was standing in front of the open freezer in my boxers, holding a bright blue plastic hippo filled with mystery gel. Our eleven-month-old son was in the other room, screaming like...
Why bamboo preemie clothes are the only thing you should pack
I'm standing at the warmer in bed spot four, untangling a mess of yellow and blue lead wires. The mother next to me is holding up a standard zero-to-three-month onesie that someone gifted her at a shower she barely got...
The Truth About Suction Bowls for Toddlers (And What Actually Works)
It was 6:13 PM on a random Tuesday, and I was wearing a grey college sweatshirt that used to belong to my husband Dave but was now permanently stained with what I desperately hoped was just pureed sweet potato. Maya,...
A Letter to My Past Self About the Physics of Baby Tableware
Dear Marcus from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting at the kitchen island, staring at a splatter of pureed sweet potato slowly seeping beneath the 'Esc' key of your favorite mechanical keyboard. You're holding a standard ceramic ramekin in...