The Honest Truth About Play Mats For Babies
I was on my hands and knees with a spray bottle of carpet cleaner, frantically scrubbing neon yellow newborn poop out of our cheap apartment carpeting, while my oldest screamed his absolute head off in a bouncy seat nearby. It...
The Ping Requests: Why Your Infant Knows When You Grab The Device
It's 3:17 AM here in Portland. The rain is doing that annoying misty thing against the window where it doesn't quite sound like rain, just a low-level static. I've my 11-month-old daughter in my left arm. I've a bottle of...
Raising Kids, Not Nepo Babies: A Rural Texas Mom's Reality Check
I'm sitting on the floor of my living room, staring at a literal mountain of brightly colored, battery-operated plastic garbage that my oldest child just received for his third birthday, and he's crying. I mean real, full-body, gasping-for-air sobs. Why?...
What nobody tells you about the most popular baby names 2024
My mother-in-law told me I had to pick an astrologically aligned name or my son's digestion would be ruined forever. The lactation consultant at shift change whispered that giving a kid an 'A' name makes them aggressive. Then my husband's...
The hilariously chaotic quest to find a safe lil baby album
I was sitting in the dark at half past midnight on a Tuesday, entirely covered in what I deeply hoped was just pureed parsnip from dinner, trying to complete a simple parental task. The twins, Florence and Matilda, had finally...
The Kelce Taylor Baby Trend and What Postpartum Really Takes
My phone was vibrating violently against the armrest while I attempted to balance a screaming two-week-old on my forearm like a very angry, leaky football. On the cracked screen were three unread messages offering wildly contradictory instructions on how to...
Navigating the Overwhelming Baby Industry Without Losing Your Mind
I'm currently staring at a mountain of mismatched Paw Patrol socks on my living room floor, trying to fold laundry before my toddler wakes up, and my phone just buzzed with a notification from a parenting app I forgot I...
How to Get Baby Nessie in Fisch (Without Ruining Your Weekend)
My living room currently sounds like a server room during a distributed denial-of-service attack, except the alarms are just my wife's nine-year-old nephew, Leo, aggressively clicking a mouse, while my eleven-month-old daughter aggressively hits a wooden block against the coffee...
The Boho Decor Disaster: Why Baby's Breath Flowers and Toddlers Clash
I was halfway through positioning a wicker basket that cost more than my first car when I noticed one of the twins chewing thoughtfully on what looked like a dried twig. We were attempting a DIY first-birthday photoshoot in our...