Teething Nightmares, 90s Nostalgia, and the Vanilla Ice Ice Ice Baby
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and our kitchen floor was aggressively cold. Maya was six months old and shrieking like a tiny, angry banshee because her bottom left tooth was trying to break through her gums with the...
What Is Baby Led Weaning? My Messy, Honest Survival Story
It was 2:14 PM on a Tuesday, and I was wearing a gray nursing tank that smelled faintly of sour milk and desperation. I was standing in the middle of my kitchen, holding a giant, freshly steamed floret of broccoli...
When Can Babies Eat Baby Food? A Dad's Guide To The Mess
It was 5:43 PM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting cross-legged on the kitchen floor, using a single wet wipe to scrape what used to be a premium organic avocado off the skirting board. Above me, my twin daughters...
That 3am cough, the sticky spoon, and the great honey panic
It was 3:14 in the morning, rain was battering the living room windows of our London flat, and Twin A was barking like a chain-smoking seal. Twin B, not to be outdone by her sister's theatrics, had started a sort...
The baby 2015 rulebook shift and why my mother is still appalled
My motherβs voice was echoing out of the iPad, bouncing off the kitchen tiles, and rising to a pitch usually reserved for discovering a burglar in the sitting room. I was holding a small, plastic spoon loaded with smooth peanut...
Dear Me: The Truth About Giving A Baby Ruth Candy Bar To A Toddler
October 31st, 11:30 PM. The kid is finally asleep. You're sitting on the living room floor surrounded by a mountain of plastic pumpkin loot. You unwrap a baby ruth candy bar. You look at it. You think about how your...
The Baby Ruth Conundrum: Candy Hazards & Expert Parenting Truths
Last Tuesday, my mother casually suggested I rub some whiskey on my 11-month-old's swollen gums and hand him a chunk of a baby ruth candy bar to chew on while I made dinner. Two hours later, my neighborβa veteran dad...
How To Relieve Constipation In Babies Quickly (Without Panicking)
Dear Tom of eighteen months ago. You're currently standing in the kitchen at 3:17 AM, illuminated only by the aggressive LED glow of the microwave clock, holding a completely rigid infant. Mayaβs face is the exact shade of a Royal...
Debugging dinner: My panic-induced deep dive into organic baby food
It was Tuesday night, 6:14 PM, and my kitchen looked like a crime scene involving a very small, very angry sweet potato. My wife, Sarah, was trying to scrape orange sludge off the ceiling while I sat on the floor,...