Magazine

Vintage october 15 beanie baby next to a modern organic cotton bodysuit on a nursery shelf.

Chasing the October 15 Beanie Baby: A New Dad's Reality Check

My mother-in-law's package arrived at our Portland apartment on a rainy Tuesday, smelling faintly of attic dust and the Clinton administration. Inside was a neon-orange plush pumpkin with hard plastic eyes staring blankly into the void. Sarah, my wife, immediately...

Read more

A tired dad looking at a spreadsheet of baby gifts on his laptop.

Troubleshooting the New Mums and Baby Gifts Australia Market

Three different people gave me completely conflicting advice when my sister in Sydney had her baby last month. My neighbor here in Portland told me to ship a six-foot plush kangaroo because "babies love scale." My childless project manager suggested...

Read more

Me drinking cold coffee while my toddler plays with a silicone teething toy on the living room rug.

How a Tiny Mola Fish Baby Fixed My Sustainable Parenting Guilt

It was 6:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was wearing Dave’s old college sweatpants backwards because the dog had thrown up on mine. I was standing in the middle of the kitchen, clutching yesterday’s lukewarm coffee in a chipped...

Read more

A tired father watching his twin daughters make a massive mess with ground beef

The absolute terror of serving meat baby food to a six-month-old

There I was, standing in our kitchen at half past seven in the morning, staring at a cardboard tube of organic baby rice that looked and smelled exactly like the Polyfilla I used to patch the hallway skirting board last...

Read more

Dried white baby's breath flowers in a glass mason jar

The Truth About Baby's Breath Flowers (And Why I Threw Mine Out)

Dave was holding a black lawn-and-leaf trash bag open while I aggressively shoved thirty mason jars of dried white flowers into it, weeping slightly, wearing only a nursing bra and a pair of his grey sweatpants. There was crumbly white...

Read more

A slightly battered 90s unicorn plush toy sitting on a nursery shelf

The May 21st Beanie Baby Illusion: Vintage Plushies vs Reality

I was three pints deep into a Tuesday evening and aggressively outbidding a woman named 'Susan_Collects_94' on eBay for a slightly moth-eaten unicorn. My wife walked into the kitchen, took one look at the glowing iPad screen, and asked if...

Read more

A vintage Ty Lizzy the Lizard beanie baby sitting next to a wooden nursery play gym

The chaotic truth about hunting down a May 11th beanie baby

Whatever you do, don't lie in the dark at two in the morning, covered in a thin but incredibly resilient layer of what I can only hope is regurgitated formula, fiercely battling a stranger on the internet for a stuffed...

Read more

Vintage 1990s stuffed bear sitting next to modern organic baby toys

A letter to past me about the march 27th beanie baby obsession

Dear Priya of six months ago. You're currently sitting on the edge of the guest bathroom tub at two in the morning. The baby is finally asleep after three false starts, and instead of closing your eyes, you're squinting at...

Read more

Mom holding a vintage green plush bear next to a baby nursery shelf

Why That Vintage March 17 Beanie Baby Belongs on a High Shelf

I was literally sitting on the living room floor, knee-deep in a mountain of unfolded toddler shirts and cardboard shipping boxes for my Etsy shop, when the front screen door slammed. My mom breezed into the house carrying a cloudy...

Read more