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My Spectacular Fails Before Giving Up On Toddler Flare Jeans
It was 10:14 AM on a random Tuesday, and I was wearing faded black leggings that hadn't seen the inside of a yoga studio since Obama was in office. I was holding a lukewarm iced coffee from that local place...
The Absolute Truth About Toddler Boy Sweaters
"Put him in raw wool, it builds character and keeps the chest warm," my mother-in-law announced over Thanksgiving turkey while Leo, my four-year-old, was actively trying to staple a piece of ham to the dining room table. Meanwhile, my best...
Dear Past Me: The Bamboo Toddler Blanket Is Actually Worth It
Dear Jess of six months ago. You're currently sitting on the floor of the nursery at 2:14 AM, using your teeth to try and unjam a zipper on a fleece sleep sack that somehow got stuck on a blowout-ruined diaper...
The Catastrophic Christening That Sold Me On Spanish Baby Clothes
The great christening disaster of last October began not with a dropped cake or a forgotten prayer book, but with a synthetic ruffle. We were sitting in the slightly damp function room of a local gastropub, attempting to celebrate my...
Dear Past Me: The Absolute Messy Truth About Rock Babykleidung
Dear Sarah of exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the Target parking lot with the AC blasting because it’s ungodly hot, ignoring your steering wheel which is completely sticky because your iced oat milk latte just aggressively leaked...
Why suction bowls are actually about motor skills, not clean floors
I'm currently scraping dried avocado off the baseboard with a plastic pediatric tongue depressor I stole from my old hospital ward. People think the whole point of a suction bowl is to prevent this exact scenario. They assume it's just...
Why I Finally Bought a Montessori Jungle Gym (And If It's Worth It)
"Get down from the television stand before you crack your head open and I've to explain to the ER nurse why you've a volume knob imprinted on your forehead." That was my Tuesday morning, shouted over the sound of the...
Geschenke für 1-Jährige: Honest First Birthday Gifts You Need
My mom called me the week before my oldest turned one and proudly announced she was buying him one of those plastic sit-in walkers so he could chase the dog around the kitchen. Two hours later, my crunchy sister-in-law texted...
Why Traditional Toddler Rompers Are Actually A Complete Nightmare
I'm balancing my lukewarm iced vanilla latte on the edge of the incredibly questionable diaper changing station in the Target family restroom while my then two-and-a-half-year-old, Maya, is doing the frantic, knee-knocking pee dance. She is wearing this absolutely precious,...