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A dad holding a baby in an oversized yellow onesie

The Truth About Burt’s Bees Infant Gear: A Dad's Guide

At approximately 3:14 am last Tuesday, I found myself trying to locate my daughter Alice’s foot inside a yellow sleepsuit that appeared to have been tailored for a medium-sized golden retriever. I was sweating, the baby was screaming, and the...

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Two modern wooden baby beds side by side in a dimly lit nursery

What Nobody Tells You About Buying Cribs for Babies

I was sitting on the floor of what used to be my home office, dripping sweat onto a set of Scandinavian assembly instructions, clutching a tiny Allen key like a weapon. It was 2am. My wife was heavily pregnant with...

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Exhausted dad holding a baby nappy up to the light at 3am trying to figure out if neon mustard yellow is normal.

Dear Past Tom: A Warning About The Dijon Mustard Situation

Dear Past Tom, You're probably reading this while standing in the maternity ward bathroom, staring at a tiny, screaming human you met roughly four hours ago. You're holding a nappy under the harsh fluorescent light, and you're sweating. You've just...

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A tired dad holding a baby bottle and a tin of organic infant milk

Finding the Best Organic Baby Formula (Without Losing Your Mind)

Dear Tom of two years ago, You're currently standing in the kitchen in yesterday's tracksuit bottoms, using the dim light of the microwave to read the German instructions on a tin of imported infant milk. Both twins are screaming upstairs...

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Frustrated dad looking at a baby gate at the top of the stairs

Finding the Best Baby Gates Before Your Children Learn to Fly

At exactly 4:12 PM on a rainy Tuesday, I watched my daughter, who until that morning had possessed the mobility of a sack of King Edward potatoes, execute a perfect commando crawl across the living room and attempt to eat...

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Tired dad looking at a newborn safely asleep in a flat minimalist bedside bassinet

The absurdly high stakes of keeping your bassinet baby alive

Before we even brought the twins home from the hospital, three different people gave me three mutually exclusive pieces of advice about where they should sleep. My mother-in-law insisted I needed to line their little bedside cribs with rolled-up cashmere...

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A tired dad looking at baby toys scattered across a living room floor

Surviving 29 Weeks: From Butternut Squashes to Tiny Terrorists

I'm currently watching a piece of steamed sweet potato make its third, highly ambitious trajectory across my kitchen, propelled by the shockingly strong left arm of a child who, until very recently, was basically a sentient bag of flour. If...

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A desperately tired London dad holding two burp cloths

Dear Past Tom: Surviving When Your Baby's Coming Back Up

Dear Past Tom of six months ago, You're currently sitting in The Crown on a rainy Tuesday afternoon, enjoying a rare hour of unsupervised freedom while your mother-in-law watches the twins. You have consumed exactly one and a half pints...

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A stressed dad testing the baby's bath temp with his elbow.

Surviving the High-Stakes Math of Your Baby's Bath Temp

I'm currently bent double over a plastic tub that looks suspiciously like an oversized Tupperware container, plunging my left elbow into lukewarm water while Twin A tries to ingest a highly questionable bath sponge. It's precisely 6:14 PM, a time...

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