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A tired dad staring at his phone in a dark room (max 125 chars)

Why Searching Baby Dolls Dallas Is A Hilarious Parenting Mistake

Texas, for those who haven't had the pleasure of dragging a jet-lagged toddler through it, is less a state and more an ongoing experiment in aggressive air conditioning. We were staying in an Airbnb that smelled faintly of cinnamon and...

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A tired dad sitting on a sandy beach surrounded by chaotic baby gear

The Honest Dad's Guide to Surviving the Baby Beach

At exactly 8:14 AM last Tuesday, I found myself standing at the edge of the dunes in West Sussex, carrying three oversized tote bags, a cooler, a parasol, and two shrieking two-year-old girls who had just discovered that wind exists....

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Tom Selleck holding an infant next to modern safe sleep cot guidelines

Watching Three Men And A Baby At 3AM Will Not Calm Your Nerves

Dear Tom of six months ago. You're currently sitting on the sofa in the pitch dark. It's 3:14 AM. You have one twin asleep on your left shoulder, drooling a thick, milky substance onto your only clean t-shirt, and the...

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Tom's kitchen counter dominated by bottles and the large baby brezza machine

Note to past Tom: Getting the baby brezza sterilizer sorted

Dear Tom of six months ago, It's currently 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I know exactly what you're doing. You're standing in the kitchen in your oversized grey joggers, staring bleary-eyed into a rolling boil of tap water on...

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Tired mother holding a sleeping newborn while looking at a smartphone screen in a dark nursery

Carrying His Babies Stealing His Heart: Expecting Twins Reality

I was sitting in the dark at 3 a.m., trying to keep my eyes open while my son aggressively refused to sleep. The breast pump was making a mechanical wheezing sound that I swear had a syncopated rhythm to it....

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A tired dad holding a clinging baby dressed in an organic cotton bodysuit.

What I Wish I Knew About Raising Your Very Own Human Baby Sloth

Dear Tom of exactly six months ago, You're currently hiding in the downstairs loo while the kettle boils, pressing your forehead against the cold tiles. It's 3:14 am. Twin A has refused to be put down since Tuesday, and Twin...

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Exhausted dad holding a screaming twin while frantically scrolling through his phone in the dark

The 'I Had a Baby Without You Dailymotion' Solo Parent Truth

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was covered in a highly suspicious layer of what I stubbornly told myself was only pureed sweet potato. Twin A was asleep on my chest, breathing with the heavy, damp rattle...

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Dad holding a smartphone trying to film twin toddlers in Kianao bodysuits

Why I ruined bedtime with that viral Million Dollar Baby song

I was crouching behind the living room sofa, my phone balanced precariously on a half-empty packet of water wipes, waiting for the heavy bass to drop. The plan was incredibly simple. I'd film Florence and Matilda in their breakfast-stained sleepsuits,...

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A tired dad staring at a massive pile of useless newborn infant gear in a nursery

A Letter to My Clueless Past Self About Hoarding Baby Gear

You're currently standing in aisle four of John Lewis, holding a £40 electronic device designed exclusively to warm wet wipes, quietly convincing yourself that if the twins experience a cold wipe on their bottoms, it'll somehow ruin their developmental trajectory...

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