My baby my baby: Sorting through the noise of the first year
The car ride home from the hospital is the longest thirty minutes of your life. Every pothole feels like a personal threat. Once you cross the threshold of your home, the reality sets in. On my first day back, my...
The Truth About Newborn Crying and Why You Don't See Tears Yet
It was 2:14 AM, and my oldest son Jackson—who is my personal cautionary tale for literally every parenting mistake a human can make—was doing this high-pitched pterodactyl shriek that vibrated directly in my molars. I was shining my iPhone flashlight...
When is kat timpf's baby due? The late pregnancy waiting game
I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant, sitting in my kitchen with ankles the size of bruised grapefruits, aggressively googling when is kat timpf's baby due. It was a completely irrational fixation. I don't know this woman. But she had announced her...
That Terrifying Silence: Why Do Babies Cry When Born Explained
The operating room was literally freezing. I'm talking meat-locker cold, which nobody warns you about when you're prepping for an emergency C-section. I was shivering so hard my teeth were clicking together, staring at this giant blue paper drape while...
Pretty Little Baby I'm So In Love With You: The Reality
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the driver's seat of the Honda, parked terribly across two spaces at the local Target. The air conditioning is blasting but you're still sweating through your oversized maternity t-shirt...
The brutal reality of picking rare names for your daughter
I spent three years working the night shift on the maternity floor at Rush. You want to know the actual hardest part of the job. It wasn't the meconium blowouts or the frantic monitor alarms at two in the morning....
Why The Baby Delight Bassinet Might Actually Save Your Sanity
It was 3:14 in the morning, and I was staring at a fifteen-hundred-dollar spaceship of a smart sleeper that my colicky firstborn was currently screaming bloody murder inside of. That was the exact moment I realized the biggest myth in...
The Newborn Survival Guide For When You're Running On Empty
I’m standing in the hallway at 3:14 AM, bouncing on my heels until my calves burn, holding my oldest son who's screaming like I’ve personally offended his ancestors. I keep whispering, "baby come to me, just come here, let me...
The Baby Buddha Breast Pump: A Dad’s Guide to Troubleshooting
It was 3 AM, and I was holding a pair of digital calipers, trying to measure my wife's nipples to the exact millimeter while she glared at me from the edge of the bed. This isn't exactly how I pictured...