The Truth About Baby Shoes: A Letter To My Clueless Past Self
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago. You're currently standing in the clearance aisle at Nordstrom Rack at like, 2:15 PM on a Tuesday, wearing those black leggings with the dried yogurt stain on the left knee, aggressively holding a...
Decoding the Relentless Midnight Screams of Your Tiny Human
It’s 3:14 in the morning and both twins are vibrating with the kind of acoustic violence usually reserved for heavy metal festivals. I'm standing in the dark, rocking on my heels in a rhythm that has permanently damaged my lower...
The Baby Gronk Illusion and What It Means for Normal Parents
It was exactly 5:43 AM. I was sitting on a suspiciously sticky silicone weaning mat on the living room floor, clutching a lukewarm cup of instant coffee, watching a young boy push a weighted metal sled across an astroturf field...
What I Got Completely Wrong About My First Baby Bouncer Seat
It was a Tuesday at like, 2 PM, and I was sitting on the damp bath mat in my tiny apartment bathroom, wearing a stained gray nursing bra and exactly one sock. Leo was three and a half weeks old....
The Truth About When Your Baby Will Actually Start Talking
It was late 2018, and I was sitting cross-legged on a primary-colored foam puzzle mat in a community center basement that smelled faintly of bleached diapers and absolute despair. I was wearing yoga pants that had definitely never seen the...
What On Earth Is A Skilla Baby? Sorting Out Real Milestone Myths
Three different people gave me completely contradictory advice about raising a baby in the exact same twenty-four-hour period after I brought my oldest son, Leo, home from the hospital seven years ago. My mother-in-law, standing in my cramped kitchen wearing...
Why that classic seated baby walker is actually a terrible idea
Last Diwali, my mother-in-law cornered me near the samosas with a brightly colored plastic catalog she had acquired from god knows where. She flipped to a dog-eared page and pointed to a massive plastic saucer surrounded by wheels and covered...
The great purée delusion: Surviving the transition to solids
I'm staring at forty-two perfectly uniform, ice-cube-sized blocks of steamed organic courgette, all painstakingly decanted into a premium silicone freezer tray at one in the morning. This was my Everest. I had spent an entire Sunday boiling, blending, and portioning...
Why a Creepy Lifelike Baby Doll Saved My Sanity With Sibling Prep
I was sitting on my incredibly stained West Elm rug at two in the afternoon on a Tuesday, wearing maternity leggings that definitely had dried yogurt on the left thigh, watching my three-year-old son Leo attempt a WWE-style suplex on...